Rude or tasteless anagrams

Please leave now if you'll be offended by these. As with the spam anagrams, I'll try to put the most tame at the top of the page, in general, but tastes differ. Note: I don't like the subject matter of some of these either or agree with the sentiment, and some are quite tasteless.

Anagrams that are new since the last update will have a 'NEW:' in front of them (new 'grams are not necessarily at the top).


United States Marine Corps =
Earn smut/erotica stipends.


 NEW:
No-clothes duty in ~ the nudist colony.


Striptease = Trite. Passe.


 NEW:
A wet dream ~ made ...water?


Morning wood = In wrong mood?


 NEW:
Topless bars = Bra-loss step
(or 'bra-less stop')


Succumbing to temptation = Tobacco, smut, gun, pint,... time!


Erotic massage = Orgasmic tease.


 NEW:
[A summary of perpetuation of the species:] Human reproduction = Cum, parenthood, ruin.


Escort service, = or secret vices


Make-out session = Misuse seat/nook.


[Someone popped into the group to ask a quick question...]
"Do anagram-hunters have a sex-life ???" =
Loving fans - a harem - are exhausted!


Breast augmentation = One mutates. Giant bra!


"I don't use prophylactic devices!" =
Er, invite child custody case, Pop.


A soiled diaper = Idea's "ripe load".

And now that the smell is in mind, here's the vista to accompany it:
Soiled diapers = Roadside piles.


Her naughtiest pose = See-through panties


Love will always find a way =
We say: "Downfall via a willy."


Want to come up and see my etchings? =
I need pussy magnet to catch women.


Emission of wind from the anus =
Information: he disowns fumes.

Two date, sigh ~ "It was the dog".


Text message! = Get mates/sex!


Large penis = Pleasing 'er.


Decolletage --
College date!
Glee located...


The world's oldest profession =
Psst - need short ride? Follow!


Webster's Dictionary = Yes, nice words: 'bra', 'tit'...


Wet dreams = Dew stream.


Sporting an erection = Gent's in. Procreation.
= Is pregnant erotic? No.
= ... sent organic protein.


It's Mister Floppy = Tipsy? Softer, limp.


Getting a divorce = Tag groin "Evicted"


[As it's metaphorical, this might not belong in this section, but there's not really a better one for it.]
All's wankers in suits, stroking bishops, ~ at business skills training workshops.


Buying Viagra online = Big 'an' young an' virile.


Sixty-nine = Sexy, innit?


The Bristol Stool Scale = Label or test shits... Cool!


Rocky mountain oysters = Isn't scrotum okay on rye?


The Testicle Cookbook - Cooking With Balls, by Ljubomir Erovic =
Look out, boys! Objective: boil big knackers. Limit: whole crotch!


What to buy your sweetheart on Valentine's Day...
Now why not a venereal disease? A hurty butt-toy?


Having unprotected intercourse = Voice: "Can't I return the nude sprog?"


Human reproduction = Cum, parenthood, ruin.


Lady of negotiable virtue
= Of ideal beauty? Revolting?
= Adultery: inevitable goof?


An erect penis = Escape, intern!


Homosexual partners = To explore harms anus.


[From the BDSM magazine rack]
More Than Vanilla = Violent anal harm!


Assert when she lies spread-eagle on the bed: ~
She desires leather bondage. He wants sleep.


[In honour of George Carlin's 1972 arrest for his sketch about a certain seven words that one couldn't say on radio]

Huff 'I spurn them - cocksucker, tits, ~
shit, piss, fuck, cunt, motherfucker'


alt.sex.fetish.robots = Fit extra bolts/hoses!

alt.sex.bondage = Latex and 'So beg!'


Dangly bits = Bad styling!


alt.sex.masturbation
= Exorbitant smut, alas.
= Buxom starlet, a stain.


(for the guys)
Pleasuring oneself =
One's eager fun spill.

(for the ladies)
Pleasuring oneself =
Open. Use all fingers.


Yoni (Sanskrit), meaning 'vulva' = Men kiss vagina - involuntary?


"But, doctor, what is a penis 'enhancement' surgery?"
"His tadger's to be put on a nicer man (they unscrew)."


Passing gas = Gasping ass.


The newspaper subscription
= Nice... no, superb: wraps pet shit.
= Air's scent: pup pee, brown shit.


Good manners: = End on orgasm.


Dark? No light comes down? = Glow-in-the-dark condoms!

Glow-in-the-dark condoms
= Women hold a strong dick.
= One old man's dick growth.

Wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom =
Naked, downright cool wang aimer.


The large penises
= Sting here, please!
= Sigh 'please enter'!
= See gris elephant!



"I do not like wearing condoms" = AIDS network login. Do come in.

"I don't like wearing condoms" = Wood, interlocking men, AIDS.


The act of cunnilingus
= Can filth ruin tongues?
= Nice until "Ugh! No farts!"


Prehensile tail = Real lithe penis.


Binge and purge = Dine, burp an egg.


'Say it with flowers.' = Rose. Why: swift tail.

The florist's
= ...for the slit.
= Fist her lots!


Old people's home = Oh, deep poo smell!


Nathaniel Fried's ultrasound vasectomies =
Such fun alternatives: monasteries, a dildo...


Clitoral massage
= Cor! A slit's agleam.
= Clam is great also!


Fishy smell! = Slimy flesh!


Due to adult content, viewer discretion is advised =
Erotica, "Inside Venus", "Tits Uncovered", "Dildoed Twat", ...


The female of the species
= Cleft emits heap o' feeesh! or
= Tip: camel toe, feesh. Feesh!


Birth control devices... =
'Cover rod!'
'Listen, bitch...'


Two-dollar whores ~ swallow hot order.


The Morningwood Labs Manhood Mold =
Mammoth boner? Ah, do long dildos now!


Perform cunnilingus
= Sinful, cum-prone grin.
= Finger in. Slurp on cum.
= No gremlins in fur cup?


Gynaecologists = Soggy acts, no lie!


To have a monthly period = Vile, hot red tampon ahoy!


Want clam ... See monthly curse ...
The woman's menstrual cycle.


The large penises
= The sleeping arse.
= A tense sheep/girl.


Anal probes = A pal's boner.


McDonald's 'special sauce' = Salad concealed piss & cum.


In rectal examinations, ~ I insert... an exclamation!

Fleet enemas ~ feel meanest.

Anal fissure ~ is real SNAFU.

The anal fissure ~ hastens failure.

The anal fissure = Feel a hurt in ass.


Found in the Kama Sutra:
'The people in the Southern countries have also a congress in the anus, that is called the lower congress'.
=
Ah, no-one here would admit such partaking of the non-vaginal chute. Let's lie, then. Cast these aspersions on other cultures' arses!


alt.sex.bestiality = It's 'lay & exit stable'.
And, on a related note,
My stable relationship: ~ I slept by _other_ animals.


[An anagram of the first recorded post to alt.anagrams, referring to the group's tendency to lower the tone[

Does anyone know what this is an anagram is?

Square Fire Insect


Thank You!
=

Yawn. The first thread has not one 'wank', 'squick', or 'Asian anime yonis' usage.


A split beaver shot = Observe - that's a lip.

Split-beaver shot
= Barest hot pelvis!
= Let pro shave bits!

The strap-on's visible ~ in split-beaver shots.


Michael Jackson = Jail? Ah, _men_'s cock!


Felt pussy or aureole ~ to pleasure yourself?

Pleasuring oneself = Online & large? 'Fess up!

Play with oneself
= Why pole inflates.
= Filthy! Now asleep.
= Lastly, phone wife.
[and for females]
= Open. Fishy, all wet.


An erect penis = Entrap nieces?


[A South African woman gave birth to a baby that had developed in her liver. The child has been named 'Nhlahla' (Zulu for 'luck'). It is quite rare for such babies to survive; Jack Krige, a liver specialist who helped deliver the girl, said 'She is truly a miracle baby'. The placenta cannot be removed from the liver and will be left there.]

'Luck' and her pregnant mother: a live delivery =
Nhlahla endured mocking: 'Ever try liver pate?'


A toothless whore ~ has two other 'oles...

A filthy whore = Hole? Why, a rift!


The singer Natalie Jane Imbruglia =
'Beer. A hug. Internal genitalia. Jism!'


Hone plastic surgery, ~ relocating her pussy!


Richard Gere urban legend = Ugh - gerbil can redden rear!


A McDonalds quarter-pounder with cheese and fries =
"That's so queer a find, dude! Semen, red hair, clown crap..."


Clitoridectomies = Medics' erotic toil.

Clit piercing = Clip it, cringe.


[A porn actress who has hit the news more than once]
Jasmine St. Clair
~ jams articles in.
= As in 'rectal jism'.
= Clear jism stain.


Vibrator tester Debbie Lancaster =
Babe lets reverberation distract.

Vibrator tester Debbie Lancaster, in the Sun =
Bad behavior: insert, belt utterances, insert...


Soapy tit wank = Way to spank it!


Inmates on death row
= Morons await the end.
~ wait months, are done.
= Wrath and noose time!


Sniper attacks = Parts in casket.


You might have heard of the Roadkill Cafe. Even if not, you might be able to make a few guesses as to what the menu might contain. The most expensive item on the menu might be the 'hired car' elk loaf. Or one could opt for simpler fare: 'Heck, tail alfredo!'


Feminine hygiene products = Tidy up minge for nice sheen!
= Grime deep in one fishy cunt?


List of concentration camps in Germany: Esterwegen, Sachsenburg, Gundelsheim, Dieborg...
=
Caring Ubermensch gentlemen heat groggy men 'til outside's crisp and nose/face is brown.


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