Headlines in anagrams

But first, some perennial reminders:                              
    National news = "Law's not inane!"
    News report = Pro-Western?
    National news = "Want No Aliens!"

[2 May 2025 -
Sophie Lloyd, whose membership in the Magic Circle was revoked on the day the society voted to admit women (because she fessed up to fooling the group by passing its entrance exams in a male guise), is readmitted.]

Sophie Lloyd = Despoil holy = Solidly hope
 

[19 April 2025 -
After thumbing of the Trump administration's collective nose at court orders to return a bunch of people whisked off from the US to El Salvador under the 1798 Alien Enemies Act, the Supreme Court acts more swiftly to order a halt to the due-process-free removal of Venezuelans claimed to be part of an "invasion" by the gang Tren de Aragua.]

Tren de Aragua = A rant & rage due

Meanwhile, the White House cites these and other removals as a victory for the rest of the population, law-abiding Americans.
Law-abiding Americans
= Drama, as "big lie"can win.
= Blind awe & racism, again.
= Can we ID alarming bias?
= Wild amnesiac bargain
= A new radicalism in bag
 

[9 April 2025 -
After producing a dire wolf of sorts, a Dallas-based company announces plans to resurrect mammoths, the dodo, and other lost beasts.]

Colossal Biosciences = Basic clone is so close
Alternatively,
Colossal Biosciences = BS; i.e., classic eco-loons
 

[2 April 2025 -
On what President Trump has dubbed Liberation Day, twitchy markets and news outlets keep a close eye on impending announcements of "sweeping" new tariffs.]

Liberation Day
= Alibi not ready.
= Read: no ability.
= Only a diatribe...
= Yo, rail at Biden!
= Do I ban reality?
= A deal!  (Tiny biro)
= Obit already in.
= I rant 'Ideal, boy!'
= I layer it on - bad!

And a couple of (likely-)sillier ones:
Liberation Day = Tony Blair idea
Liberation Day = An idiot, barely ~ a brain, yet idol!?
A "Liberation Day" = "I try anal-bead I/O"
 

[31 March 2025 -
Announcements of impending tarrifs from the US have the predictable effect, expressed rather crudely here.]

Stock prices plummet = Lips meet Trump's cock
 

[27 March 2025 -
A BBC documentary shines light on scammers who have cleared out people's life savings on the promise of casks of rare whisky.]

Craig Brooks = Gob, corks, air
I grab crooks:  Craig Brooks
 

[17 March 2025 -
A spacecraft finally arrives at the International Space Station to carry home the two people who had expected to stay there a week but ended up stranded for roughly 10 months.]

Butch Wilmore and Suni Williams = Cursed humans will wait in limbo.

This must have taken a toll, or perhaps they were better prepared than most:
Butch Wilmore and Suni Williams
= ISS limbo... "Trauma? We unwind & chill."
= Columbia-white walls ruin minds!
 

[6 March 2025 -
As geopolitical shifts appear to align the US more toward Russia and less toward Europe, leaders east of the pond have expressed an interest in raising regional security - but via actions or mere words?]

"ReArm Europe Plan" = More paper? Unreal!
 

[5 March 2025 -
The US President redoubles his efforts to impose "peace" via Ukrainian capitulation.]

Regrettably an anti-gram:
Trumpian peace plan = Napalm a creep (Putin)

The reality might be closer to
Trumpian peace plans = paper Putin manacles
Or even
Trumpian peace plans = Putin-camp plea/snare
 

[5 February 2025 -
A brainchild of Brezhnev is raised from the dead as Putin calls on Brazil, China, and other allies to take part in a song contest initiated as a Soviet-era counter to Eurovision.]

Intervision~'s nine visitors...
Intervision = Invest in Rio!
 

[4 February 2025 -
President Trump issues a proposal to resettle the Gaza area, with the US taking a real-estate baron's ownership position
aimed at creating a "Riviera of the Middle East".]

The Riviera of the Middle East
= Harm's elevated. Fire the idiot!
= Divide the real estate for him.

Thief/idiot/arse marveled:    "Riviera of the Middle East!"
Riviera of the Middle East = Israel verified that mode.
 

[January 2025 -
Residents along a neglected stretch of road have erected signs advertising the tourist attraction Pothole Land,
pushing the authorities into action to fill the "deepest, longest, widest potholes in Wales".]

"Pothole Land" spoof: top wager ~ to help poor Pontfadog, Wales
Pontfadog, Wales  =  We tag #Spoofland
 

[Autumn 2024 -
The months leading up to the US Presidential election produce much musing on the last time we were here.]

"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies."
   — Groucho Marx
=
Logic, for Trump: "If voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal."  
So, in big error or crowning idiocy, our ex-Pres. inferred "I won! Stop the steal!"
 

[16 September 2024 -
Cloudflare failures affect large stretches of the Internet, again.]

Crude, costly failure:    Cloudflare security
Cloudflare security = Clue: frail, rusty code
 

[14 July 2024 -
Candidate Trump is shot from a nearby rooftop at a rally in Pennsylvania by a man with this name.]

Thomas Matthew Crooks = Watch, shoot, make storm
 

[1 March 2024 -
In the - protracted - lead-up to the US Presidential election, it seems to be six of one, half a dozen of the other.]

Joe Biden and Donald Trump = Job ad: "Inept? Damned old? Run."
 

[17 November 2023 -
Post-bankruptcy, the FTX financial "visionary" was found guilty on all seven counts.]

Samuel Bankman-Fried is convicted = Mad Bitcoin-fraud maven sees clink
 

[November 2023 -
The leader of the Russian empire seeks to strengthen his alliances abroad.
And a few leaders prove receptive, even within the EU.]

Putin and Orban = Apt brand: "Union"
 

[26 October 2023 -
A mass shooting in a bowling alley and restaurant leaves chaos in its wake
amid a hunt for the gunman in the US north-east.]

Lewiston, Maine = Woe & lament is in!
 

[29 July 2023 -
The artist formerly known as Twitter unveils a new logo.
This is its official definition.]

MATHEMATICAL DOUBLE-STRUCK CAPITAL X
= Cult chap masturbated to a climax. "Like!"
 

[27 March 2023 -
A former student opens fire at his/her former school in Nashville, killing six.]

"Aiden" Hale  =  A headline!
 

[20 March 2023 -
Crawling its way across Australia is a new species of "giant" spider...]

Or Euoplos dignitas   =  I log on to spiders.au.

[February 2023 -
A study, albeit only in mice, holds out promise for advances in the reproduction realm.]

Male contraceptives = Tactic: leave no sperm
 

[December 2022 -
Russia's propaganda effluvia give greater prominence to anti-Ukraine claims
that genetic manipulation is powering Zelensky's resistance oppression effort.]

Peruse Russian Radio link:   "Ukrainian Super-Soldiers"

"Ukrainian Super-Soldiers"  =  Russian ink, perilous read
Russians pour in, read, & Like  ~   "Ukrainian Super-Soldiers"
"Ukrainian Super-Soldiers"  =  Spoiler: Russia are unkind
 

[12 October 2022]

RIP Dame Angela Lansbury  =   Slain? A murder play began.
 

[August 2022 -
A "serious" class-action lawsuit has been mounted against a notorious child-focused facility in London,
which has been ordered to close its doors.]

The Tavistock gender clinic
= Act's inverting dick/hole, etc.
= Trait-deleting: cock etc. vanish.
... but now...
= Genital verdict (the cock)'s in!
as opposed to...
= Genital verdict: it's cock/hen!

At the Tavistock gender clinic,  ~  "treating" = "I'd let cock etc. vanish".
Or we could expand on this...
At the Tavistock children's gender clinic, ~ "Vanish, darn cock! I'll get enriched tits!"  Etc.
 

[July 2022 -
Friction has coalesced around particular phrases applied for the sake of inclusion.]

Young people who menstruate
= Women on the rag (plus you, Pete)
= Guy open to he-tampons: "We rule!"
Or
     So, one guy let tampon up where?
     We, uh, retool guys - peen tampon!
= A hope: purely women. Gents out!
 

[Through 2022...
the land war in Europe grinds on. This includes Russian propaganda and general bellicosity.
The bringer of war does not take setbacks well.]

Savage Mars   ->   a mass grave

Vladimir Putin   =  Livid, Trumpian
 

[24 February 2022]

Putin invades Ukraine   =  An update: Kiev in ruins
 

[Late December 2021
sees the socialite and sleaze-ball partner of convicted paedophile Jeffrey Epstein in the news,
to be handed a conviction in her own court case.]

Ghislaine Maxwell = An illegal-sex whim
 

[30 December 2021 -
A California man pulled over for aggressive driving explains that he'd been on his way to kill the people in power,
using the words found in the latter half of my anagram.]

Listen to me, chum: I, we have to shoot Biden   ~  to combat evil demons in the White House!
 

[17 December 2021 -
A French anti-mass-migration activist reports a home invasion and sexual assault in which she "manage[d] to open the door and push [the accused Tunisian man] out" but not before he made sure to pick up his cigarette butts so as to leave no evidence of having been in her home.]

Thaïs d'Escufon = A confused shït
Or
Thais d'Escufon ~ has it confused.

[Late November 2021 -
With a new SARS-CoV-2 from southern Africa leading to imposition of new travel restrictions,
a few mutated letters seem to be in order.]

The Omicron variant
= No mirth, vacationer!
= I, the corona varmint

A "variant of concern" = Vent: "African corona?!"
 

[7 October 2021 -
Today marks the 20th anniversary of the start to Operation Enduring Freedom in Afghanistan.
Time to look back on those years, methinks.]

Operation Enduring Freedom = One-time god: "No repair/refund!"
 

[September 2021 -
The Taliban rush to fill the void left by US withdrawal from Afghanistan.]

Inevitable outcome: loss in Afghanistan
= Vietnam association. The nub: Saigon fell
 

[2 September 2021
marks the death of Greek composer Mikis Theodorakis, who achieved his greatest fame for his music scores
and as an icon of resistance to military rule.]

So can geezer Theodorakis' burial sample ~ Zorba the Greek, Serpico, Melos, & Andalusia?

 

[20 July 2021 -
In the lead-up to the Olympics, it is announced that the events will soon see their first transgender athlete.]

Olympic weightlifter Laurel Hubbard
= Chubby male / prettier half-girl. I would!
 

[11 Jul. 2021]

England loses in the Euro Cup final = Anguish upon decline. Tears fell, no?
Floundering & lethal panic ensue, so ~ England loses in the Euro Cup final

England could establish and perhaps even win football's One Nations!
England loses in the Euro Cup final = Upshot: fell in urinal, gonna secede?
 

[In the throes of the pandemic, 2021]

In "the COVID era",  ~ hide & rot in cave

Anti-travel ad:   "Delta variant"
 

[7 July 2021 -
England win the UEFA Euro Cup 2020 football semifinal.]

England beat Denmark = Be sad. Gentleman drank.
 

[23 June 2021 -
A cringe-worthy jingoistic tune becomes available at youtube.com/watch?v=dfzjhfE1jT0.
Best avoided.]

"Strong Britain, Great Nation"
= Tots' inane, grating brain-rot!
= Start booing & ranting near it.
 

[4 June 2021 -
"Royal baby" news incites some some public furore related to use of the Queen's private nickname from days of yore.]

Lilibet Diana Mountbatten-Windsor ~ won't bid in Subtle Traditional Name

Lilibet Diana Mountbatten-Windsor
= Let's edit a bit: "Britain London Wuman"
= Wouldn't traditional be best? "I'm Nina."
 

[28 April 2021 -
It's the final departure from Earth for another early voyager to Luna.]

Astronaut Michael Collins = A lunatic recalls moon shit
 

[April 2021 -
NASA's OSIRIS-REx has travelled to near-Earth asteroid Bennu, mounted it, and
drilled out a small sample to bring back to Earth for study.]

Osiris Rex tags Bennu
= A rig's extension rubs...
= Gig: send treasure in box
= Extra-big drone's genius!

Osiris Rex tagged Bennu
= It's boring under-age sex.   (A groaner, I know)
= Dirt in box sure engages!

Osiris Rex has tagged Bennu
= Begin asteroid sex, shag, run!
 

[18 March 2021 -
WallStreetBets members, who refer to themselves as apes, have donated substantial sums for gorilla conservation
after pumping the stock of GameStop. This power has not, however, made Earth a planet of the apes, yet.]

In the movie, "apes together strong".
= Or on the Net, "GameStop" is the giver
 

[January 2021 -
The actual-news pages are full to bursting this month.]

Presidential impeachment trial
= Is it terminal? I'd napalm the creep!
= Derail inert, pathetic, simple man

Trump side fear ~ a dumpster fire

Climate-changers ~ etch glaciers, man!
Chemical agent = Climate change

War Power Resolution ~ narrows "Wipe out!" role
 

[December 2020 -
We hear details of a disturbing case involving an Indonesian student's 10-year trail of rapes and lies,
with at least 190 known victims.]

The PhD student Reynhard Sinaga = Nasty. He raped hundreds at night.
 

[19 October 2020 -
Participants in a New Yorker Zoom call witnessed this fellow reporter masturbating, and he has been suspended from his work.]

Jeffrey Toobin = Notify: Job-free!
Or
Jeffrey Toobin = "Job offer in yet?"
 

[13 October 2020]

Coronavirus snot just nailed ~ Juventus's Cristiano Ronaldo.
Or
Juventus's Cristiano Ronaldo ~ joined coronavirus totals - fun!
 

[28 August 2020 -
Donald Trump recently used this phrase to refer to what President Joe Biden would be,
but many other candidates for this title can be listed.]

The destroyer of American greatness
= Shady mergers? Corona? Teens? RT? Fate?
= Man's foes: terror & atheist degeneracy
= The terror syndicate? Freemasons? Age?
= Germany or Confederate states' heirs?
= A "reformer", shitty CEOs, and teenagers!
= That Fed + IRS + corona + Senate merger, yes?
= Try the orange SS confederate armies!

Motif as cheesy orange retard enters,
"the destroyer of American greatness"
~ refers to mirage-and-cons theatre, yes?
 

[11 August 2020 -
Damage to an iconic astronomical facility disheartens the scientific community
while also casting our minds back to telescopic feats of decades past.]

The Arecibo Observatory
= Rot, too shabby a receiver
= Orbit-above research toy
= Trash? Boo.  Recover it? eBay?
= Theory: "I trace orbs above"
 

[23 July 2020 -
President Trump toots his horn at passing a memory test.]

See a vain, moronic man's mental power:
"Person, woman, man, camera, television"

What's actually being tested here?
"Person, woman, man, camera, television":
"Went senile" vs. "perma-moron in a coma"

"Person, woman, man, camera, television"
= Clever ape-man: "So I want room in Mensa!"

Not much has changed;
this is the man who tweeted the following description of himself at a NATO summit in July 2018:
"A very stable genius"
Guy elevates brains
 

[13 July 2020 -
The Washington Redskins are in search of a new, less weighted-down name.]

The Washington Football Team
= Left howling "that name's taboo!"

= Not the Slow Fat Gabon Tamil, eh?
Maybe those are the wrong sort of Indians. Could be worse, though.
State low: the Fat Albino Hmong
 

[May 2020]

Race riots = So erratic!

Black Lives Matter = Be calm. Talk. Strive.
 

[10 May 2020 -
In a private conference call, former US President Obama calls the country's handling of the pandemic
"an absolute chaotic disaster".]

An absolute chaotic disaster
= Cue corona shit-list database
... Which needs a name, so...
= A title: "Corona Causes Bad Shit"
 

[29 April 2020]

Elon Musk: "FREE AMERICA NOW"
= "Me, I wear no mask!" Encore: flu...
= We make US car (lemon, on fire)
= Firearms welcome! A nuke, no.
 

[19 April 2020 -
Dressed as a cop, a man goes on a shooting and arson spree in Nova Scotia, killing at least 22 people.]

Gabriel Wortman = It grew abnormal.
 

[12 March 2020 -
An Islamic scholar who described the novel coronavirus as Allah's punishment for China's treatment of Muslims
now has been diagnosed with the viral infection.]

Hadi Al-Modarresi = Dismal diarrhoea
His next public appearance might be as a spokesman in a "horrid malaise ad".
Let's just hope that his religious fervour ("Islam OD - diarrhea") doesn't lead to intolerance such as railroaded Amish.
 

[2 February 2020 -
An Islamist-linked knife attack is carried out in London by a man recently released
after serving part of his sentence for terror crimes.]

Sudesh Amman: He's a damn Mus–
Showing his true colours in any case:
Sudesh Amman = Madman's hues
 

[31 January 2020 -
A new 50-pence coin enters circulation, bearing an inscription that bears anagramming.]

Peace, prosperity and friendship with all nations
= Reality: pain & pestilence, pints of hardship. Onward!
And here's the politicised version:
Tory tailspin down: fear, hardship, pain, & pestilence
 

[18 January 2020 -
Musician David Olney, who has written songs for such performers as Emmylou Harris, died onstage a few days ago.
With positive messages and songs such as "Stand Tall" and "Death Will Not Divide Us", this anagram might seem apt.]

David Olney = Oddly naive
 

[January 2020 -
Netflix have made a deal with Gwyneth Paltrow's company Goop to create a pseudoscience series aimed at "deeply inquisitive viewers".
They, however, define the subject matter slightly differently.]

"Boundary-pushing wellness topics"
= Nope, BS. Gwyneth's ridiculous plans.
= Lie-using Paltrow: PhD by consensus?
 

[15 November 2019 -
A new facility opens in the UK.]

The Vagina Museum in London:   Animating Venus-mound hole
"#VenusMound #manhole" - I tag  ~  the Vagina Museum, London
 

[19 October 2019 -
From among various similar efforts, the UK Parliament passes the Letwin Amendment,
intended to prevent the possibility of a "no-deal" Brexit at the end of October.]

Sir Oliver Letwin = Revise till win, or...
Sir Oliver Letwin = Nov.'s "I will retire"
 

[14 September 2019 -
The Wall Street Journal reports on the US President seeking a particular participant in this year's G7 summit.
He may have been referring to the leader of Egypt, but there are plenty of other options.]

Donald Trump's "Where's my favorite dictator?"
= Fat dummy is to wed Soviet-era PRC Darth L. Ron.
In other words,
"Where's my favorite dictator?" =
A Red itch - wet for Soviet army!

"Where's my favorite dictator?" —Donald Trump
= Wordy maniac-rater voted himself top turd!
 

[22 August 2019 -
Revelations emerge: various doctors at fertility clinics have secretly used their own sperm to impregnate patients.
This guy is one of them.]

Kim McMorries
= Crime irks mom.
= Mr "I'm come risk".
 

[28 June 2019 -
This guy has been freed after decades in prison for killing his wife and children, then his parents (and their dog)
once friends and relatives had grown suspicious of his phony investment plans, WHO career, and medical degree.]

Jean-Claude Romand
= JAMA: "Lad cured none"
= Man conjured a deal
 

[20 April 2025 -
A group by this name organised a "straight pride" rally in Boston.]

Super Happy Fun America = "Firearms up, paunchy ape!"
 

[June 2019 -
An item appears that might require adjusting the television's colour balance.]

A case of third-degree sunburn = Nudist beach-goers are red. Fun!
 

[28 May 2019 -
A US government employee kills at least a dozen people at his workplace in Virginia after the weekend.]

DeWayne Craddock = "Wrecked day? Can do!"
 

[24 May 2019 -
Today provides confirmation of developments that have been circling in the papers for some time now.]

The newspapers: "LONDON - Theresa May will soon resign"
= Powerless pawn's lesson in the Iron Lady throne game
 

[29 March 2019 -
The original deadline for the UK departing from the European Union passes, with numerous questions remaining unanswered.
Here is a "Q & A" offering anagrams of common questions on the topic.]

· What is Brexit? =
          · "Wax their bits!"
          · Exhibit warts.

· What are the main issues? =
          · Maths awaits NHS, Eire, & EU
          · A mess.   We ruin shit.   Eat? Ha!
          · Is Theresa human? I sweat.

· When's it going to be? =
          · Woe begins tonight!
          · Tweeting big "Oh, no!"s

· What is the backstop? =
          · St Pat with backhoes.
 

[10 March 2019 -
The crashing of an Ethiopian Airlines flight kills numerous UN representatives and others in an echo of the Lion Air crash five months earlier.
Both involve Boeing's new 737 MAX, with an ill-regarded anti-stalling system that is enmired in cover-ups etc.]

Boeing's share price = Pioneer big crashes
Crashing aeroplanes = Carnage. Orphans. Lies.
 

[20 February 2019 -
Television actor Jussie Smollett claims to have received a threatening letter with "You will die black fag" in letters cut from a magazine,
ransom-note-style. While some claim that he crafted the letter himself as a "cry for help", even the existence of such a letter may be in doubt.]

"You will die black fag" = Awful lie by dick. Gaol?
 

[10 December 2018 -
I offer an "anti-gram" of an ultrarunner who recently broke two world records in running more than 260 km in a 24-hour race
(a piece on her latest achievements is featured at https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/athletics/46566122).]

Camille Herron = "I'm no racer!"
 

[In the weeks of confusion as 29 March 2019 looms ever larger on the calendar
and multiple "meaningful votes" are held on UK Prime Minister Theresa May's proto-plan]

A no-deal Brexit = Exiled to a barn = "Extra-alone!" bid

Can there be any winners?

Meaningful vote
= Info: a glum event
= Fuming "Not Leave!?"
= Fun/violent game
= Vomitage funnel

Responding, hit at May:   "Dystopian nightmare!"

And the crystal ball says...
Dystopian nightmare
= Dethroning May is apt
= Meaning: typhoid, rats
= Tory-made thing: pain!
 

[30 November 2018 -
The 41st President of the USA, who was well-known for some of his family's relations
and for certain disastrous catchphrases, passes away.]

The Yale grad, navy man, and oil millionaire Pres. George H.W. Bush
~ swore "Enough, Billy Graham! Read my lips: God in heaven ain't real."
 

[17 November 2018 -
President Trump's visit to a certain wildfire-stricken community in California and his later repeated misrendering of its name
are fodder for jokes and also an anagram or two.]

Trump sees the trouble in Paradise = "Um, the entire 'Pleasure Trip''s so bad!"
 

[7 October 2018 -
The latest US Supreme Court nominee has been confirmed, with the Senate vote focusing more on specific old-boys'-club-linked allegations than on his unsuitability for the office. Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg exudes dicomfort at his swearing-in ceremony.]

Justice Brett Michael Kavanaugh
= A caveat: I'm in that huge jerks' club.
= Cue "I'm Ruth." Gavel hit back at jeans.
= Ruth B.G.: Mace in jacket - it has value.
= Ah, I like beer - jug, vat, cans that cum, ...
 

[1 October 2018 -
President Trump's Supreme Court nominee stumbles amid questions about a past soaked in alcohol and sexual impropriety.]

Judge Brett Michael Kavanaugh = Huge junk? I'm glad. Vacate the bar!

His unadorned name looks pretty incriminating in anagram terms, though we needn't rely on letter rearrangement for evidence of perjury:
Brett Kavanaugh = Haunt bar, keg, & vat

And here's the Catholic school that served as the backdrop to many of the hijinx reported upon:
Georgetown Prep = Get groper on pew!
 

[20 September 2018 -
The rap mogul has pleaded no contest to voluntary manslaughter and agreed to spend 28 years in prison.]

[Autumn 2018 -
Tensions mount as both the British PM and the European chief negotiator in charge of Brexit arrangements refuse to budge.]

The EU's Michel Bernard Barnier
= "Be calm, Britain. Surrender! Hehe."
= Brits end remain/rebel race: "Huh?"
 

[Early September 2018 -
Referencing a black American football player's gesture of kneeling during the US national anthem at matches
in protest over the treatment of black people, Nike create an "inspirational" meme.]

"Believe in something, even if it means sacrificing everything. #JustDoIt"  — A Nike advert
= I figure "eek!" if it's advice given to Mr Jones, thirty-nine Heaven's Gate victims, & Bin Laden.

Alternatively,
"Believe in something, even if it means sacrificing everything."  — A Nike advert
= "A fine, fine vision! Ace!"  — Thirty-nine Heaven's Gate members giving "Like" verdict
 

[23 August 2018 -
President Trump spews another late-night tweet, this one referencing investigations into alleged collusion with Russia
for purposes of securing the highest office in the land.]

Loon uncoils:  "NO COLLUSION!"

Considering the tweet in full, we have
Choice loon/twit's hurling dung:   "NO COLLUSION - RIGGED WITCH HUNT!"

 

[14 August 2018 -
A bridge collapse in Italy leaves dozens of people dead when a section of motorway falls in a densely populated area.]

Ponte Morandi ~ imparted no-no.
Ponte Morandi = "Inept moron!" ad = "No tape, Nimrod!"
Ponte Morandi bridge = End bad trip: "Geronimo!"
Genoa's Morandi bridge = Morbid danger - agonise.

[19 May 2018]

Royal wedding
= Real giddy now?
= Dire gown, lady!
= Oddly wearing
= End a wild orgy...
 

[20 June 2018 -
The US President appeals for a logo for the "space marines" he wishes to create.]

"A space force as the sixth branch of the armed forces"  — Donald Trump
= US hatch bad plan: do "scorched earth" from parsecs off. EXTERMINATE!

Some shorter takes on the subject:
Space force
= Scope: farce
= Faeces crop

As for possible final results,
Space force = Corpse cafe
 

[3 May 2018 -
A Dublin hotel- and cafe-owner bans "social media influencers" from his businesses after shaming a 22-year-old YouTube "personality"
who had asked for a free stay during an upcoming trip in return for publicity.]

The White Moose Cafe and Charleville Lodge = To chief SwindleHotelagram leech: "Do leave."

Social-media influencers = A million dunce faces rise
 

[25 April 2018 -
A killer on a rampage cites a cause rooted in involuntary-celibacy rhetoric online as his inspiration.]

[25 March 2018 -
Many crytocurencies, systems based on "blockchain" technology, have been on stormy seas lately:
Bitcoin, Thiscoin, Thatcoin, ...]

A blockchain system = Shy? Back metal coins.
A blockchain system ~ let mass coin hack by.
 

[14 March 2018 -
The physicist who brought cosmology etc. strongly into public awareness leaves our universe behind.]

Professor Stephen William Hawking, the author of A Brief History of Time
=
Final thoughts: "Look for my batteries! Where's a spare?"
How finite of him.
RIP.

Here's a slightly darker option:
Stephen W. Hawking, author of A Brief History of Time
= "Whoa! Shut me off! I know the battery is on fire. Agh!" RIP.
 

[11 January 2018 -
The final member of the classic line-up of legendarily loud rock band Motörhead passes away.]

[12 January 2018 -
The US President declares that he prefers immigration who enter the US from nations such as Norway,
not "shithole countries".]

I insult, others echo:
"Shithole countries"
 

[20 November 2017 per the headlines]

Old, ill, mad-ass/insane schemer ~ Charles Milles Manson Is Dead.

Charles Manson dies...
An ass, held on crimes.

Madman's ills score headlines:
Charles Milles Manson Is Dead.

And a note on his criminal history:
Charles Manson = Lasso-men ranch
 

[10 October 2017 -
More and more women, from Oscar-winning actresses to office assistants,
share reports of having been "Harveyed" by the movie mogul.]

Harvey Weinstein, CBE
= I screw naive, then "bye!"
= Every bitch seen: a win!

Harvey Weinstein
= I, heavyset winner...
= I wave - "hey, interns!"

Harvey Weinstein ~ wins (they're naive).
Harvey Weinstein ~ invites anywhere.
 

[1 October 2017 -
While country singer Jason Aldean performs at a festival in Las Vegas, a local white man later identified as professional gambler Stephen Paddock
sprays the crowd with gunfire from a hotel across the street. The death toll now stands at 77.]

Mandalay Bay Hotel = Boy may halt Aldean
The Mandalay Bay Hotel = Mayday ball, then Tahoe?
Stephen Craig Paddock ~ had deep crackpot sign.
Stephen Craig Paddock ~ pocketed a grand (chips).

Stephen Craig Paddock
= On-edge prick. Sad patch.
= A Grand, Epic Shock Dept.
 

[27 September 2017 -
Creepy guy and Playboy visionary Hugh Hefner dies, leaving behind quite a legacy.]

The Playboy Mansion
= The Pay&Lay Bosom Inn
= Yo! Holy penis, Batman!
 

[19 September 2017 -
Ryanair have been receiving bad press for cancelling quite a few flights (because of bad planning),
sometimes with under 24 hours' notice, and not informing would-be passengers of their rights.
These anagrams are among the results.]

Flight cancellations = Gain all the conflicts!
Try sharing fail:  Ryanair flights
Low-cost airlines = I.e., Clown/liar toss!

Budget airline
= A built-in greed
= Bag late, ruin, die

A budget airline = Big idea: run late!

Some new possible players in this field, as a bonus:
Budget airlines
= Rusting Be Ideal
= Bruised Genital
= Arse, I'd Bungle It
= Late Bird - genius!
 

[21 August 2017 -
A young Moroccan man going by this name attacks people near the market in Turku, Finland.]

Abderrahman Mechkah
= Harm! Hack hard! Be mean!
= Mark "Bad", hence harm.
 

[19 May 2017 -
Here's a little obituary anagram for a guy who made a difference, often regarded as preventing World War III
but who saw himself as just having done his job. See http://time.com/4947879/stanislav-petrov-russia-nuclear-war-obituary/.]

Stanislav Petrov~'s pivotal servant.
 

Ushering in the new year...

Power-mad nut = Trump and woe

[Late 2016 -
These hit the news in the wake of van- and lorry-based terrorism.]

Hostile vehicle mitigation barriers = I limit big hire cars. Those are violent.
Hostile vehicle mitigation measures = I limit ISIS some: relocate the huge van.
 

[25 December 2016 -
The singer and proponent of gay rights otherwise known as George Michael dies.]

Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou = A serious gay (too gay?) icon. RIP, OK?

Two related silly anagrams found along the way:
Georgios Panayiotou = Notorious gay, I go ape.
George Michael has died = A ragged hole hides mice.
 

[23 December 2016 -
The spirited actress and sporter of hairborne Danish pastries has died, leaving future Star Wars films without a Princess Leia.]

Carrie Fisher = Hair's fiercer!
Actress Carrie Frances Fisher has died = Character arc's finished (fears, desires, ...)

Carrie Fisher wrote: "Now I think that this would make for a fantastic obit -
so I tell my younger friends that no matter how I go, I want it reported that
I drowned in moonlight, strangled by my own bra."
=
On tits beneath that Leia outfit, writer / film man George said no underwear'd fit them in space.
Asked why it won't, Mr Myth Initiator told a horror story on body swelling - a knot with no fabric growth...
 

[9 December 2016]

Aviator and astronaut John Glenn is dead.
= Joins Neil to haunt at NASA grave. Darn odd.
 

[25 November 2016 -
A former leader much beloved of a certain Florida sect has shuffled off his mortal coil, and views of his legacy are mixed:
positive or negative, fascist or socialist, etc.]

Red head / fascist idol ~ Fidel Castro has died.
Fidel Castro = Old fart's ice.
Fidel Castro ~ is cold after...)
 

[7 November 2016 -
I offer an anagram in memory of recently deceased musician Leonard Cohen.
It touches on his foray into Scientology, as referenced in his iconic song "Famous Blue Raincoat").]

Leonard Norman Cohen = Non-"Clear"? No harm done.
 

[21 October 2016]

Businessman "Sir" Philip Green faces the Honours Forfeiture Committee
= Secure enormous humiliation here, in effect for me asset-stripping BHS

Philip Green = Ripe helping!
 

[13 October 2016 -
Thailand has a new king.]

Ah, loving a major rank = Maha Vajiralongkorn
 

[October 2016 -
A new food is on offer at McDonald's in Japan.]

Choco pumpkin fries = Hip reps: "I cook McFun!"
 

[13 October 2016 -
The news takes us to Thailand, offering anagrammers some challenging letters.]

King Bhumibol
= I'm hulk / big nob
= Uh, big-knob.mil?
 

[Most of 2016 in the US]

Election coverage
= Go create violence!
= Ego! Violence! React!
 

[5–21 August 2016]

Olympic Games = Some gym. I clap.
 

[12 July 2016 -
The makers of Pokémon Go, the game with which mobile phones are leading their owners to look for virtual creatures at places such as Arlington National Cemetery, are quite interested in the power of Big Data. They're Niantic Labs, a spin-off of Google's parent company.
Nothing sinister here then.]

Niantic Labs
= Cabals, innit?
= "Scan it in!" lab
 

[Late July 2016]

Democratic National Convention = Intent on comical tornado / cave-in

Republican National Convention = Loon / no-brain active nut - nice plan!
Republican National Convention = Banner: "Political novice / nut anon!"
 

[Summer 2016 -
Developments in the lead-up to the US Presidential election include announcements of running mates.
We begin with the Virginia politician who is the running mate of Hillary Clinton.]

In the context of the race as a whole, this might fit:
Timothy Michael Kaine = I.e., a thick man. Oh, timely!

Donald Trump has announced that his running mate is
Michael Pence = "Help came - nice!"
Trump–Pence:   Men crept up

Summing up the role of a running mate, and a Vice-President, and perhaps a wise approach in light of Mr Trump's volatility:
Mike R. Pence = Meek prince

Finally, a post-election post scriptum:
Vice President Michael Richard Pence = P.S. Nicer end: impeach/evict rich leader!

The compulsive liar:
Trump: he is all voice!
 

[June 2016 -
This is not how he passed away, but the anagram serves to mark the time of passing of Muhammad Ali.]

A suicide's classy = Cassius Clay dies
 

[25 June 2016 -
As Brexit reality sets in, arguments involve when and whether to formally give notice of leaving the European Union
under the establishing treaty. Reality is setting in.]

Invoking Article Fifty = Fricking vote finality
 

[24 June 2016 -
Citizens of the UK wake to the news that the Leave camp have emerged triumphant in the Brexit vote.
Uncertainty rules the day.]

Leaving the European Union
= Into a guano heap. Nil revenue.
= Then poor. Nine-guinea value.
= Avenue: Out. Alone, pining her.
 

[23 June 2016 -
UK voters are to decide on whether to leave the European Union or remain.
No-one seems quite sure what the consequences of either outcome might be.]

The Brexit vote...
To vex the tribe
 

[26 April 2016 -
In the Netherlands, a sadistic dentist has been caught after mutilating more than 100 patients' mouths.]

The dentist Jacobus Van Nierop
= Sad teeth, in pain. Job's over, cunt!
 

[17 March 2016 -
The well-known British stage magician has died.]

Paul Daniels,
As in "dupe all"
 

[14 March 2016 -
Another icon of his day, of Emerson, Lake, and Palmer fame, passes away.]

Keith Emerson:    Keen trio mesh
Or
Keith Emerson  =  Keen: "More hits!"
 
 

[10 March 2016 -
Several more obituaries have hit the news, for
the Beatles record producer, an eminent figure in the development of e-mail, and a characterful theatrical director, respectively.]

George Martin = Get 'em roaring
Ray Tomlinson = "At" is only norm
Michael S. White = He lies with cam
 

[4 February 2016 -
Edgar Mitchell, the sixth man on the moon, has died. After having a life-changing experience in space, he'd ended up devoting much of his life to noetics, mystical realms, and his belief that aliens have visited Earth.]

Edgar Mitchell = Helmet-rig-clad
Astronaut Ed Mitchell = Lame noetic "truths", lad.
Astronaut Edgar Dean Mitchell = Add more earthlings at Luna, etc.
 

[11 February 2016 -
The BBC announces the line-up of new hosts for hit programme Top Gear.
In the left-hand side's farewell to the old, there's a bonus reference to the show's recentish number-plate fiasco.]

Need a press-giant driver? Rich "BEll END"s (friends Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, James May) drove the ritziest cars, but so can
~
Top Gear's James "Chris" Evans, Matt Steven LeBlanc, Edmund "Eddie" Jordan, Sabine Schmitz (formerly Reck), Rory Reid, and Chris Harris.
 

[31 January 2016]

Sir Terry Wogan has now died
= A dear wordy hit resigns.
= Redesign award history.
 

[19 January 2016 -
Many iconic musicians have died within the last month.
The latest to check out is Eagles founder and guitarist Glenn Frey.]

Glenn Lewis Frey is dead = End is "rewind - Eagles fly!"
 

[6 January 2016 -
North Korea declares that it has followed Oppenheimer all the way to developing a hydrogen bomb.]

North Korea's H bomb  =  Thanks, Bob O. - Mr Hero!
 

[28 December 2015 -
The Motörhead frontman and rock 'n' roll icon, who gave us songs such as "Ace of Spades", succumbs rapidly to cancer.]

Lemmy is "killed by death" (brain cancer)
= Blare CD: Ace hymn led by Ian Kilmister.
 

[November 2015 and at least the next 12 months -
The political circus that is the US Presidential election ramps up. This is an anagrammatical guide to most of the people who have declared their candidacy thus far, in no particular order and without much seriousness as to the foibles any might have.]

President Webb = Twerp needs bib
President Webb = "We'd spent bribe."

President Carson = Nondescript arse
President Carson = Sad-cretin person
President Carson ~ needs racist porn
President Carson...  Reconsider pants!
President Carson = Sincerest pardon?

President J. Bush ~ = Just beer-&-sin PhD
Or
President J. Bush = NB: Dish up jester

President O'Malley = Demoralise plenty.
President O'Malley ~ redeploys ailment.

President Hillary = Lady Hitler ripens.
President Hillary = Dreary, inept shill
President Hillary = Slithery, and peril
President Hillary Clinton = tl;dr: Hitler in nylons - epic!
Install Hitlery Peron in DC: President Hillary Clinton?!
President Hillary Clinton ~ sinned plenty (RICO) - a thrill!

President Sanders = Sad pretender sins.
And a what-if chronology of sorts:
And serpents sired ~ President Sanders.
President Sanders.~ errs. Add ineptness.
President Sanders ~ dreads sniper nest.
President Sanders ~ departs in redness.
On the topic of redness, he has some socialist leanings, so...
President Bernie Sanders = Badness in Red enterprise

President Trump = Ten putrid sperm
President Trump = Muppet trend, sir
President Trump = Pimp/turd enters.
President Trump = Mr Putin, red pest!
 

[September 2015 -
The news outlets introduce us to the term "cyberflashing",
for sending "dick pics" to fellow passengers' phones and similar.]

A cyberflasher = Racy bare flesh
 

[5 August 2015 -
Apparently, thousands of women have been posting photos of their cellulite, stretch marks, etc. on Twitter under the tag #Thighreading, with the aim of celebrating bodies of all shapes and sizes.]

Thighreading = Dire hag thing?
 

[1 July 2015 -
CNN has little cause for pride in a certain report on London's gay-pride celebrations,
thanks to correspondent Lucy Pawle. See, for example, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/06/27/cnn-isis-flag-gay-pride_n_7679298.html.]

Lady plus flawed logic = Lucy Pawle's dildo flag.
 

[14 June 2015 -
Comments at the World Conference of Science Journalists spark debate
and the firing of the Nobel laureate who made them.
Here is the most widely quoted excerpt and one possible response.]

"Let me tell you about my trouble with girls. Three things happen when they are in the lab:
you fall in love with them; they fall in love with you; and when you criticise them, they cry."
=
Why the hell are they whiny about the humour attempted here by Nobel winner Tim Hunt?
Foolish, yes, with a highly politically incorrect statement, yet "awful", "vile", "hugely evil"? No.
 

[4 June 2015 -
The news is filled with reports on a libido-enhancing drug for women, dubbed "the female Viagra".]

The drug flibanserin ~
left rabid hunger & sin. ~
in Three Bad Girls fun.

The drug flibanserin
= Untiring bared flesh!
= Neat bush, girlfriend!
= Enter rabid, flushing.
 

[23 May 2015 -
Russians apply "sound reducers" for removal of Crimea-related booing
of Russia's Eurovision Song Contest entry.]

"A Million Voices" = I coo "villain's me".
 

[7 May 2015 -
"A federal judge today dismisses a Nebraska woman's lawsuit against all "homosexuals" on the grounds that it failed to request a specific remedy and relied on biblical verses in a secular court."
This is an anagram of her characterisation of herself.]

Sylvia Ann Driskell, ambassador for God and His Son Jesus Christ
= Loss. Jurists do in fags' adversary - Nebraska loon has child's mind.
 

[12 March 2015 -
Announcing Sir Terry Pratchett's recent death, the following post is made from his Twitter account.
Readers of his comic fantasy books might recognise the "speaker" here - Death uses capital letters.]

AT LAST, SIR TERRY, WE MUST WALK TOGETHER.
= Star writer makes ultra-ghostly tweet
 

[9 March 2015 -
About a day after competing in the prestigious Crufts dog show, Thendara Satisfaction collapses, later dying.
Two other dogs that took part in the competition have fallen ill from poisoning.]

Thendara Satisfaction = Fresh data: a cat's in on it!
 

[27 February 2015 -
Leonard Nimoy (known to many millions as Mr Spock) sends out a farewell tweet shortly before his death.
It is anagrammed here.]

"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory."
=
A nice exit. Star Trek's "beam me up" effect embraced Nimoy. The end.
Live long and prosper.
 

[7 January 2015 -
Twelve people die in a terrorist attack on this French satirical magazine's offices.]

Charlie Hebdo = Ah, heroic bled.
 

[7 January 2015 -
Maryland's Frederick News-Post writes the following in an editorial titled
"Kirby Delauter, Kirby Delauter, Kirby Delauter":
"Knowing Councilman Kirby Delauter as we do, we weren't surprised that he threatened The Frederick News-Post with a lawsuit because we had, he says - and we're not making this up - been putting Kirby Delauter's name in the paper without Kirby Delauter's authorization. Attorneys would be called, Kirby Delauter said."]

Kirby Delauter = I truly reek bad!
 

[3 January 2015 -
All seven campuses of Florida's FastTrain College close after many millions of dollars in fraud,
against students, taxpayers, etc. See http://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/miami-dade/article2485300.html.]

FastTrain College = Farce. It's not legal.
FastTrain College = Art's fleecing a lot.

[31 December 2014 -
Shortly after her husband gives her a handbag with a special pocket for carrying a handgun, 29-year-old nuclear research scientist Veronica Rutledge is fatally shot by her two-year-old son. Both the boy and the handbag had been placed in the front of a shopping trolley at an Idaho Walmart.]

Veronica Rutledge = Rate gun-lover "iced"
Veronica Rutledge = Lurid Net coverage
 

[8 December 2014 -
Things escalate in Putin's invasion of Crimea.]

Russia's President Vladimir Putin ~
treads in. "I disrupt maps & ruin lives."

Vain USSR Premier Stalin did sit up:
Russia's President Vladimir Putin
 

[4 December 2014 -
Pope Francis dismisses the head of his guards, Col. Daniel Anrig, apparently for his authoritarian approach. The Pope is reportedly also displeased about the penthouse flat built for Anrig's family above the Swiss Guard barracks at the Vatican. And there are questions about his past, though he claims innocence of, for instance, human rights violations in a raid he once led on a refugee centre.]

Colonel Daniel Anrig = Call on angel, & I rode in.
Daniel Anrig ~ in a grand lie...
Perhaps his case may be used as a "learning aid". We don't know all the facts,
but he probably shouldn't have decided to "drag alien in" at the immigration centre.
 

[25 November 2014]

The Ferguson riots = Gunfire shot store.
The Ferguson riots = Thefts? Ignore ours.
 

[11 November 2014 -
A new Pepsi product is undergoing testing among college students in the US: Dewitos.
Yes, this yellow-orange concoction is a Doritos-flavoured version of Mountain Dew.]

Pepsi Dewitos = I deposit spew.
 

[6 November 2014 -
The American ISP Verizon (and AT&T, on a "test" basis) inject a unique identifier into the Web traffic of each of their users, for purposes such as tracking subscribers' interests and serving tailored adverts. Third parties such as Twitter have worked this out and use these tokens, which the EFF call perma-cookies, for their own purposes (see https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2014/11/verizon-x-uidh).]

Perma-cookies
= "OK, I'm a creep. So?"
= "Spookier!" came.
 

[Early November 2014 -
By giving the Republicans a majority in the US Senate,
voters seem to be saying that their selection of Obama as President was an error.]

The USA's midterm elections
= Ahem. Mistrusted selection?
= See me hit/insult Democrats.

And here's a summary that would, in fact, suit most such elections:
The USA's midterm elections
= Menu's   __ Latest idiot/schemer
 

[20 October 2014 -
President Obama appoints a former White House official to oversee the (mis)management of ebola in the US, amidst calls to take a hard line on flights originating in certain countries. The concern, hysteria, xenophobia, etc. are likely to continue, as are classic plot elements of zombie films.]

President Obama's official "ebola czar", Mr Ron Klain
= Director airs Blacks on a Plane, an Afro-zombie film.
 

[16 October 2014 -
More reports come in from Ukrainian soldiers that they are fighting not so much the "separatists" described by Moscow as those ubiquitous Russian mercenaries dressed in green.]

The "little green men" = Let them greet Lenin!
 

[9 October 2014]

"Baby Doc" Duvalier has died of a heart attack in the capital.
=
"I don't ache a lot, pal."  —A Haiti devastated by a bad, rich fucker
 

[24 September 2014 -
Starbucks introduce the beer-flavoured coffee drink "Dark Barrel Latte"
along with upcoming seasonal drinks such as the (in)famous Pumpkin Spice Latte.]

Pumpkin Spice Latte:
It's Epic Puke Plan(TM)
 

[24 September 2014 -
Advisory body the German Ethics Council recommend that incest between siblings be decriminalised.
They explain: "The right of adult siblings to sexual self-determination weighs heavier in these cases than the abstract good of the family [...]. They feel that their basic rights are not respected and [are] forced into secrecy or denial of their love".]

German Ethics Council  =  Goal: Much nicer incest
 

[September 2014 -
Celebrity data, including nude photos and text messages, are made public,
thanks to Apple's genius and weak passwords.]

The Apple iCloud service
= See private couple / child.
= Leech video & pictures, pal.
 

[August 2014 -
At the Last Stop activity centre's Bullets and Burgers shooting range, a nine-year-old girl proves unable to manage the recoil after instructor Charles Vacca switches the Uzi in her hands to automatic mode. As her parents watch, it ends up pointing over her head and four shots are fired. Vacca is fatally shot in the head.]

Bullets and Burgers
= Bunglers rued blast.
= Dabbler. Guns. Result?
= Get a RL blunderbuss!

The "Bullets and Burgers Adventure"
= Bet absurd result unnerved the gal.
 

[August 2014 -
The phenomenon of "rollin' coal" emerges more strongly: people modifying their vehicles to belch great clouds of black smoke. It's an American thing, described by some as "pollution porn".]

Yea, a car-fume hick! = America, fuck yeah!
Rollin' coal = Ill car + loon.
 

[August 2014 -
Friends Fun Wine CEO Joe Peleg says: "We are proud to be the first-to-market with our Fun Wine In A Can, and look forward to introducing the new coffee varieties to our Fun-Loving Fans." They could get in trouble, at least if they forget to remove the caffeine (this is one of the several legal issues that Four Loko faced historically).]

Friends Fun Wine = We sniff ruin/end.
 

[11 August 2014]

Robin Williams has committed suicide
= We'd sob a curtain idiom, "I'll miss him", etc.
= I die dismal, er, comic man without bliss
 

[7 April 2014 -
After a prominent personality dies, an inquest reveals some details of the circumstances:
heroin was found in her bloodstream and drug paraphernalia in her home.]

On the basis of whether you figure enough facts are in, choose between these:
The "journalist" Peaches Geldof =  Fact: heroin helped gal to Jesus.
The "journalist" Peaches Geldof =  Judge all facts, pose "The heroin...".
 

[3 Feb. 2014 -
The actor is found dead at home with a syringe in his arm and what appeared to be about 70 bags of heroin.]

Philip Seymour Hoffman
= Oh, iffy pump-holes in arm...
= Line up arm. Hypo offs him.
 

[16 December 2013 -
Lawmakers in the US state of Michigan pass a "rape insurance" bill, amidst controversy.]

"Rape insurance" = User near panic.
 

[2 December 2013]

"Nelson Mandela Has Died"
= Headline as old man ends
 

[8 November 2013]

"Is Roadkill Safer Than Chicken McNuggets?"
= Glancing at skid marks, "Oh, lunch is free!" etc.
 

[6 November 2013 -
The news reports that these are being brought out in time for Christmas.]

Lay's Wavy potato chips dipped in chocolate
= Hippos clap, downplay tooth decay / cavities.
= Why not apply "cocoa" additives? It's cheap, pal.
 

[27 October 2013 -
The Velvet Underground frontman dies.]

Obit-hunter, now Lou Reed's inhaling ends:
Soon he will be in the satin underground.
 

[26 October 2013 -
I don't actually believe the project to carry people to the "edge of space" in a balloon-borne capsule is going to fail horribly, but...]

The World View space-balloon project
= "Hold on, love." "Eject!" We blow apart, crisp.
= Overpaid lethal clowns power object.

World View Enterprises = Er, Wild West perversion.
 

[25 October 2013 -
The BBC reports: "Bank of America's Countrywide Financial unit has been found liable for defrauding two US government-backed mortgage companies [through a] programme that was internally called 'Hustle' or 'high-speed swim lane' which allowed loans to be processed quickly without checking their quality."]

High speed swim lane = We "help", hiding a mess.
 

[20 September 2013 -
For no real reason, apart from masochism perhaps, I decide to check for anagrams of "Prirazlomnaya", the Arctic oil platform that Greenpeace activists recently boarded. The result is rather inciteful.]

Greenpeace is on the Prirazlomnaya platform
= Char Gazprom men openly in a petrol fire at sea!
 

[12 September 2013 -
Britain's National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) says that women with certain types of urinary incontinence should be given free botox injections if they don't successfully make lifestyle changes (that is, do their pelvic-floor exercises). The toxin renders the bladder wall less hyperactive.]

No more bladder exercises for urinary incontinence
= NICE: Runny seniors need a free botox clinic. Mad error!
 

[26 August 2013 -
This anagram is prompted by sparking of fires in Yosemite National Park.]

Yosemite, California, USA ~ is on fire. Aye, calamitous.
 

[21 August 2013 -
Speculation about the whereabouts of the wanted whistle-blower and former NSA contractor is rife.]

Where is Edward Snowden?
We'd answer: "Hidden? Worse?"
 

[1 August 2013 -
News reports state that "US President Barack Obama has cancelled a meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin". The decision to cancel the talks, announced during a trip by the President to Los Angeles, comes the morning after Obama said he was "disappointed" with Russia's decision to offer Edward Snowden asylum for a year.]

Pres. Obama's "disappointed", so he will not be meeting Putin.
= Imploring: "I must be appeased! Post a Snowden obit, then lie?"
 

[13 July 2013 -
The seemingly endless parade of comic-book heroes across the big screen continues.]

Heroes Superman and Batman will team up for a new film in the works.
= Freak-man alpha-male testosterone upwind. Firm men a-blur. Who wins?
 

[June 2013 -
Those choosing to use Yahoo! mail are being forced to accept an "upgrade" and, with it, new terms of service that explicitly allow snooping on mail for various advertising and other purposes (it's no longer just about "trusted partners"). They are, after all, a money-making venture. But don't worry, one can use the "Ad Interest Manager" to tailor the adverts a little / opt out of some of the personalisation.]

Ad Interest Manager -> A rant / disagreement
 

[25 May 2013 -
As part of his protest against same-sex marriage, a French writer shoots himself at the altar of Notre Dame Cathedral, thereby decreasing the number of people on his side by 1. Some might raise a glass to this outcome.]

The essayist (and a blogger) Dominique Venner ~ died. To a less queer-/gay-bashing environment!
 

[5 May 2013 -
Sailendra Nath Roy, holder of the Guinness world record for the longest trip by a zipwire attached to one's hair, tried for another record recently. The task he set himself was to cross India's Teesta River on a 180-metre-long zipline attached to his ponytail. He made it roughly halfway before dying of a heart attack.]

Sailendra Nath Roy's dead in bridge-crossing stunt
= Guinness doesn't grant "bad hair day" records in list!
 

[26 April 2013
marks the 27th anniversary of the Chernobyl disaster.]

The Chernobyl nuclear disaster = Hard concrete buries nasty hell.
The Chernobyl disaster = Shit, sorry debacle then.
 

[13 February 2013 -
A New Zealand woman's 10-litre-a-day Coca-Cola habit has been linked to her death at age 30.]

Did Coke kill Natasha Harris?
= I'd risk cola as a health drink.
 

[12 January 2013 -
Authorities in Vietnam have admitted that a 100-person team are tasked with spreading the party line in blog comments and the like. These people are termed "public opinion shapers".]

"Public opinion shapers" in Vietnam ~  can pump in visible Hanoi spin, rote.
 

[8 January 2013 -
Citing customers' desire for healthier foods, US snack-cake company Hostess declared bankruptcy, and the final Twinkies were snapped up - stockpiled or made the centre-piece of parties. It has now been announced that the iconic and disgusting junk food will continue production in Canada, reaching US shelves from there.]

A reprieve for Hostess Twinkies
= So, swine keep this fat reservoir.
 

[14 December 2012 -
Several children and adults are killed in the US's Sandy Hook Elementary school shooting.]

Sandy Hook Elementary = Yank shot "enemy". Reload!

Or, partially in a child's scrawl,
Sandy Hook Elementary = Yank shot many. REELODE!
 

[20 November 2012 -
The new look of Windows 8 is renamed "Windows 8 Modern UI",
after Microsoft get sued by Metro AG for naming it "Metro".]

Windows 8 Modern UI = I dunno, 8 worms wide?
 

[10 November 2012 -
The death of Jimmy Saville leaves a storm in its wake.]

"I like to share this secret with young men:"
"Touch this here 'n' it grows, see? Many like it."
 

[9 November 2012 -
MIT have announced their work on implantable devices powered (in part) by the ear's cochlear "biological battery". Applications include transmitting data related to the condition of the ear.]

New ear-battery-powered chips ~ won't be creepy data-whisperer.
 

[6 November 2012 -
Details of the latest US Presidential campaign emerge.]

Campaign total: seven billion dollars
= I'll plan sad "Bring me votes!" allocation.
 

[1 November 2012 -
A "superstorm" hits the US eastern seaboard.]

Hurricane Sandy = Ah, ruin scared NY!
 

[16 October 2012 -
As the US Congress looks at several new cyber-security bills, news stories are awash with talk of a possible "digital Pearl Harbor", given that, for example, "cyber criminals or terrorists have the capability to take down the country's critical financial, energy or communications infrastructure".]

A digital Pearl Harbor = Arab gal hit reload! RIP.
 

[10 October 2012]

What do Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga have in common?
= "We'd had a major band launch on stage - i.e., by vomiting."
 

[October 2012]

The US Presidential debates
= See the line-up: bastards, tied.
 

[1 September 2012 -
The government of India find some of this guy's anti-corruption cartoons too extreme.]

Aseem Trivedi = Restive media.

And here is an anagram of a quotation from a jurist complaining about the government reaction to the allegations of corruption:
"Either the allegation is true, in which case you deserve it; or it is false, in which case you ignore it.
This kind of behaviour is not acceptable in a democracy."  — Markandey Katju
=
Here, I give you rich-guy authorities in India, who just can't take his critical voice, the cue to hear one idea a parent will offer a child - i.e., "Sticks and stones may break my bones...".
 

[9 August 2012 -
This Russian feminist punk rock band get in trouble for brazen anti-Putin protest antics.]

Pussy Riot  =  Prissy? Out!
 

[1 August 2012 -
One US Presidential hopeful has had a high profile in the news lately.
This could be deemed an "anti-gram", depending on one's views.]

Willard Mitt Romney = Mr Dimwit? Not really.
 

[1 August 2012 -
We cannot escape perennial doping concerns.]

The Olympics in London = Ditch money on pills, no?
 

[22 July 2012 -
The headline anagrammed below refers to a man who exploded along with some Israeli tourists on an airport bus at the Bulgarian resort of Burgas. Some opine that the man had been trying to discourage Israelis from travelling. Israel blame Hezbollah and Iran. Etc.]

"Man in Bermuda Shorts Blows Up Bus at Burgas Airport"
= Bomb terror was bad. Pass up Bulgarian tourism hunts.
 

[21 July 2012]

"Boy Scouts Reaffirm the Gay Ban"
= Macho rot: "Bye-bye, fruits an' fags!"
 

[20 July 2012]

James Eagan Holmes and The Dark Knight Rises at an Aurora, Colorado, cinema
= One area man toting guns, a red "I am the Joker!" hairdo, and a massacre shock all.
Or
James Eagan Holmes attends The Dark Knight Rises at an Aurora, Colorado, cinema
= He's: a Glock-toting loon, a sad student, an area man, "I am the Joker!"-haired massacrer.
 

[12 July 2012 -
Upon announcement of the jury's "Guilty" verdict for burning down his mansion, a man ingests poison in court. Cyanide is later found in his car.]

"I munch on trial-room cyanide" man
= Michael Marin in court on Monday
 

[7 July 2012 -
Riffing on the "pics or it didn't happen!" theme in relation to a recent piece of science...]

The Higgs boson, or "the God Particle"
= Big delight?? Searchers got no photo!
 

[5 July 2012 -
Fear over an electronic cigarette brings in the authorities, and hordes of motorists must wait quite some time for traffic to resume on the UK's M6 motorway.]

Users of electronic cigarettes ~ ignite faceless terror. Cue cost.
 

[20 March 2012 -
The BBC run the following headline.]

"Do hunger hormones make us fat?"
= No. Forks near mouths made "huge!".
 

[10 March 2012 -
A shooting rampage takes place in the waiting room of a Pennsylvania psychiatric clinic.]

The loon stops at the psychiatrist's office
= "Psst! I set off to shoot the clinic as therapy."
 

[10 March 2012 -
The US-market recipe for Pepsi (and Coca-Cola also) is changed in response to one of the standard ingredients being declared a carcinogen in California. The brand-owners wanted to avoid having to place warning labels on their cans.]

California has deemed Pepsi carcinogenic = Panic led aims for a recipe-change decision.
Or, more simply,
Pepsi deemed carcinogenic in CA = Mice died. Recipe panic. Cans gone.
 

[27 February 2012 -
Two people perish in a fire at Brazil's Antarctic research station.]

Antarctic bonfire - film says a blaze razed ~  Brazil's Comandante Ferraz base facility.
 

[13 February 2012 -
An official with an Indonesian religious-affairs office, which grants marriage licences, estimates that a new requirement for each couple to plant two trees before receiving said permission is going to result in at least 2,000 new trees a month gracing Medan.]

The couples getting married in Medan, on Sulawesi island
= Indonesian rules: each Muslim digs, planting a tree, to wed.
 

[12 February 2012]

Whitney Houston dead = That Winehousy OD end
 

[10 January 2012 -
North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il has died.]

"Dear Leader"   ...    Er, real dead.
 

[13 November 2011 -
Russia's Phobos Grunt spacecraft continues circling Earth,
as engineers attempt to communicate with it and coax it to respond.
The engine that was supposed to boost it to Mars never fired.]

The Russian Phobos Grunt mission = Unit hushes so is not probing Mars.
 

[10 November 2011 -
Sidney Nsubunga Enoch is given a 30-year prison sentence for murdering Uganda's leading gay-rights activist.]

Sidney Nsubunga Enoch = "Shun/denounce/bin gays!"
 

[August 2011 -
An acclaimed actor stands accused of urinating on the floor of an aeroplane
after being told that he could use the toilet only later in the flight.]

Gerard Depardieu = A rude drip, agreed?
 

[August 2011]

Riots and looting in England = Ignorant lads ignite London.
 

[July 2011]

The singer Amy Winehouse found dead = Hey, was drug infusion needed at home?
 

[17 June 2011 -
A day of civil disobedience is planned in Saudi Arabia: women with a valid driving licence from another country are encouraged to drive around, while others are to be taught, on private property. how to drive.]

Women drivers' day = Men advised "Worry!"
 

[6 June 2011 -
An elderly woman selling "suicide kits", typically to those with terminal illnesses, hits the news after a young man not in this category uses one of the contraptions.]

Suicide kits = Sick? I'd use it.
 

[24 March 2011 -
Pop artists the Pet Shop Boys launch their first ballet, an adaptation of a fairy tale by possibly-spinning-in-his-grave Hans Christian Andersen. One reviewer describes this as featuring "waffling choreography", and others are far less charitable.]

Pet Shop Boys launch their first ballet = Britons help plot a faithless butchery.
 

[13 March 2010 -
With the worrying news of partial meltdown at a Japanese nuclear power plant in the wake of the recent earthquake, and the prospect of meltdown looming for a second reactor at the complex...]

Nuclear meltdown in Japan = Unwelcome ninja-land trap!

As for the earthquake that brought this about,
"An earthquake achieves what the law promises but does not in practice maintain - the equality of all men"
  — Ignazio Silone
=
It shows amazing hope too: the finest human capabilities quickly called on via elements (earth, water) in a non-quiet area.
 

[2 March 2010 -
A study hits the news:
"[...] By the end of the talk, she says, 'All the coffee had reached my bladder. And that raised the question: What happens when people experience higher levels of bladder control?' [...] The researchers found that the people with full bladders were better at holding out for the larger reward later [...]."
"'You seem to make better decisions when you have a full bladder,' Tuk says. So maybe you should drink a bottle of water before making a decision about your stock portfolio."]

"You seem to make better decisions when you have a full bladder."
= I may be an evil, dreadful arsehole to mock one wee study, but she...
And truly I can't be bothered to complete that thought about such "studies",
at least as cutely reported upon in the press.
 

[11 February 2010 -
Nokia stocks fall more than 14% when Nokia CEO and Microsoft shareholder Stephen Elop announces a "broad strategic partnership" between the two companies, less than a week after his internal memo describing Nokia as being on a burning platform.]

Nokia plus Microsoft = Main portfolio sucks.
Nokia-plus-Microsoft deal = Platform sinks - cool! Adieu.
Nokia's CEO, Stephen Elop ~ to escape open sinkhole?
 

[6 February 2010 -
Legendary guitarist Gary Moore has died at the age of 58.
From the most soulful of blues to the most blistering of solos, he will be missed.]

Gary Moore dies early this Sunday
= His guitar lay sad. No more dry eyes.
 

[December 2010 -
Full-body scanners are being rolled out at more airports, prompting outrage from those who see this "virtual strip search" as an invasion of privacy. A previous tweak to the system in at least some jurisdictions in the UK involved exempting under-18s from these scans, in the wake of outrage from some privacy-focused groups.]

Conducting virtual strip searches
= Circus stunt: "It's average child porn!"
 

[19 October 2010 -
Siegfried Rotthaeuser is circumventing - and making a statement about - an impending EU ban on high-wattage light bulbs, by selling the same product as "heatballs". For each of these 95% efficient small heaters sold, he will donate 30 cents to saving rainforests.]

Siegfried Rotthaeuser ~ steers heat for rigid EU.
Siegfried Rotthaeuser = Sir, I'd get "heaters" for EU.
 

[13 October 2010 -
All 33 people trapped down a collapsed mine in Chile have finally been rescued, after months of painstaking drilling and rescue attempts.]

The mine rescue is finished at last
= Itchiest men tease "Furnish ladies!"
= Mess in Chile - it unearthed fiestas.

Shortly thereafter, one of the miners faces interesting times: while he'd been trapped underground, his wife and mistress found out about each other as they stood just outside the mine:
A Chilean wife and mistress meet. = Free man in a mess with ladies, etc.
 

[10 September 2010 -
On Friday, Electric Light Orchestra founding member Mike Edwards dies in a freak accident:
a bale of hay rolls down a hill in Devon and collides with the 62-year-old cellist's van, causing him to swerve into another vehicle.]

Cellist Mike Edwards ~ said: "wreck stilled me".
 

[28 August 2010 -
Deemed worthy to be front-page news - and therefore worthy of an anagram - socialite Paris Hilton was riding in a car that was pouring out marijuana smoke. When the cops pulled the vehicle over, a crowd started to form, so the police ushered her and the driver into a more secluded area. At this point, Hilton decided that she needed to apply her lip balm. We join the story here.]

The American pop celebrity and rich-set socialite opening her purse...
= The coppers peer in. Naughty imbecile Paris Hilton arrested - cocaine!
 

[21 August 2010 -
After coming in for a landing, flight attendant Steven Slater yells at a passenger over the in-flight intercom, snatches at least one beer from the refreshments trolley, and flees via the plane's emergency exit.]

"... At this time, please make sure that your seat belts are securely fastened, and that your tray tables are locked and in the upright position and your carry-on baggage is securely stowed in the overhead bins or under the ..."
=
"... Prepare for l–  Arggh! I can't take that rubbish any longer! I need to curse at a lady (she deserves that, the ugly turd-teats!) and escape. Also, I could sure use beer. Yes, I'm bitter. Yes, I ain't workin' here no more!"
You don't say!
 

[May 2010 -
Aeroplanes in much of Europe are grounded for days on account of
the ash cloud from non-anagrammable Icelandic volcano Eyjafjallajokull.]

Iceland's volcanic ash plumes = Plan calm avionics schedules.
Iceland's volcanic ash plumes = Claim such can dissolve plane.
 

[29 November 2009 -
Perhaps feeling starved for publicity, fashion waif Kate Moss makes a comment that gets blasted by various groups as irresponsible and as promoting anorexia nervosa. Asked whether she has any mottos, she replies as follows.]

"Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels."
= Gist: Kate's style's no-food shenanigans.
= Insanest stylishness: gag / take no food.

 

[November 2009 -
Coming around again to hit the news in a big way is climate change.]

Climate change tips:
= Smiling, accept heat.
= Melt ice as nightcap.
= Cite the magic plans!
= CCTI helps manage it.
(The last one refers to the US Climate Change Technology Initiative)
 

[November 2009 -
News stories in various countries report fisticuffs and other nastiness at clinics
where swine-flu vaccine is being offered to at-risk groups. Opinions vary.]

Fuse when lit...  The swine flu.

The swine-flu vaccine
= We've fun at clinics, eh?
= "In", chic even. Wasteful.
= Civic waste funnel, eh?
 

[9 October 2008 -
State bank bailouts and spasms in financial markets
have created cause for concern blanketing much of the world.]

A great banking crisis looms = Big managers' risks ain't cool!

This one is more an "anti-gram":
Banking crisis   =  Brisk Gains, Inc.

As for which markets may succeed,
The most solid financial advice I could present
= "Invest in a potent alcoholic fluid - ciders, meads, ..."
 

[6 October 2008 -
Following what many have described as a lack-lustre performance in televised debates and interviews,
US Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin de-sparks confidence somewhat, for the public and media alike.]

"Concerns About Palin's Readiness as a Big Test Nears"
= A scatterbrained gal spouts basic nonsense in ears.
 

18 July 2008 -
Media reports feature Genarlow Wilson, who had been sentenced to 10 years in prison without parole for consensual oral sex with another minor. The Georgia State Supreme Court deem the punishment cruel and unusual.]

Genarlow Wilson = Er, no swallowing!
 

[25 June 2008 -
After finally gaining clearance to enter Burma, the members of Telecoms Sans Frontieres leave the country, when attempts to reach the areas they wished to serve are blocked.]

Telecoms Sans Frontieres ~ transfers me to silence. So...
 

[23 May 2008 -
Promotion of "National Vegetarian Week" is intense.]

National Vegetarian Week = An olive (Greek). Wanna eat it?
 

[20 April 2008 -
At the start of her Arctic tour, the Governor General of Canada participates in a hunting ritual in which people holding a tarp bounce someone several metres in the air for purposes of spotting potential prey. Although some expressed fears that she'd break her legs, she emerges unscathed.]

Michaelle Jean's Inuit blanket toss
= "As mine's a nice state job, I'll hunt elk."

(Since the event was held in an auditorium, I'm guessing there were rather few elk to be found, though)
 

Baggage retrieval issues = See luggage arrive as bits.
 

[27 March 2008 -
The US currency continues its slide downward.]

The United States dollar
= Tatters halted delusion.
= Old lira sat untested.
= All said "Trusted note??"
 

[24 February 2008 -
In the wake of reports of Cuban leader Fidel Castro's impending demise, the media prove that they will make much of any shred of news about developments in Cuba for the next little while.]

"Fidel Castro steps down" = Plot is newscast fodder.
 

[7 February 2008 -
Dr Rowan Williams, the Archbishop of Canterbury, sparks controversy with his opinion that Muslims in the UK should be allowed to choose to apply Islamic law rather than UK law.]

Rowan Williams = "Law in Islam" row.
 

[6 December 2007 -
Nineteen-year-old Robert Hawkins fatally shoots several others and himself at a Nebraska shopping centre. He leaves behind a note, offering apologies but also the words "I'm going to be famous".]

The suicide note said "Sorry for everything".
= His draft, "I'd try shooting everyone!", cues ire.
 

[1 November 2007 -
The man who dropped the bomb Little Boy on Hiroshima dies, at age 92.
Had he opted for a headstone, perhaps the following (rather non-PC) anagram could have adorned it.]

Enola Gay pilot Paul W. Tibbets
= Little boy upbeat - a Nip's aglow.
 

[27 October 2007 -
Iran responds defiantly to new US sanctions, aimed at state-owned banks and other institutions.
Russian President Vladimir Putin likens this to "mad people wielding razor blades".]

Dubya: "I'll damage, topple, press, and downsize Iran!" ~
And Putin says: "mad people wielding razor blades".
 

[31 August 2007 -
On the 10th anniversary of the death of Princess Diana, many think back...]

A "saint" rests, done, yet sad old ladies cry in pain
= Today, ten years on, Princess Diana is still dead.

For those who don't remember:
A car dispensed ~ a dead princess.
 

Metro: "heroin, ecstasy, cocaine, ketamine, and booze"
= Those make one crazy-arse medicine cabinet too, no?
 

Georges Prosper Remi's cartoon "Tintin" ~  promotes racist tripe. No negroes grin.
 

[July 2007 -
The US courts uphold "DC Madam" Deborah Palfrey's right to liquidate her "sole remaining asset",
more than 20 kilos of telephone records. Various members of the government and others sweat.]

Deborah Jeane Palfrey
Horny Rep. + a fee = a BJ deal
 

[April 2007 -
Harry Potter fever rises once more.]

Computer-generated images = Men agree Potter used magic.
 

Heat device + SS mentality  =  the Active Denial System.
 

[Late 2006 -
Bush fires in Australia have claimed an area the size of Cyprus in Victoria alone, according to news reports. They are showing no signs of letting up. Many down under are hoping for a white Christmas, to counter the trend.]

Australia's trend:   Natural disaster.
 

[July 2006 -
Israel enters southern Lebanon.]

"We are also pushing for an urgent end to the current hostilities, but the views of the parties on how to achieve this are different."   — Ms Condoleeza Rice, US Secretary of State
=
"Truth's we hate to infuriate or hurt groups of crazies that are friends with us.
I see fit to voice nothing to condemn Israel's acts. We feel a very clear need to be sheep - honest."
 

[May 2006 -
Finnish heavy metal band Lordi, who appear on the stage in full monster make-up,
surprise many - and some priests in host country Greece express concern.]

First time ever: Finland makes the Eurovision Song Contest finals!
= The nation's giant, offensive monsters suck! Lordi're evil manifest!!
 

[April 2006 -
Oxford win the annual Varsity Boat Race, against hated rival Cambridge.]

The Dark Blue crew are victorious in the Boat Race
= I taunt CU - "I'd teach heroic rowers: overtake rabble."
 

[February 2006 -
Well-known US anti-war activist Cindy Sheehan hits the international news when she is arrested just prior to President Bush's State of the Union address, in connection with her t-shirt making a political statement (in breach of the rules for visitors to the House gallery). This prompts media debate as to what constitutes acceptable clothing in this context.]

Cindy Sheehan's tee = "Hey, Hanes is decent!"
 

[January 2006 -
Dr Stanley Biber, believed to have performed between 4,500 and 6,000 "gender-reassignment" surgeries in 1969 to 2003, dies at the age of 82. Described in obituaries as a pioneer in this field, he also trained many physicians in such transformation.]

Breast byline:
Stanley H. Biber
 

[September 2005 -
Hurricane Katrina hits the southern US, flooding New Orleans and many other areas.]

The State of Louisiana ~  is afloat out in the sea.
 

[July 2005]

In international news Friday is:
The UK today launched a massive attempt to elicit info related to three terrorist bombs inside the Underground and a later eerie blast that tore open a central London bus.
(Yes, they reiterate "terror won't win!")
=
"Listen, and understand. That Terminator is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity. Or remorse. Or fear. And it absolutely will not stop - EVER! - until you are DEAD."
  — Kyle Reese (to Sarah Connor), in The Terminator
 

[June 2005]

"Tom Cruise Declares Undying Love for Katie Holmes on Oprah"
= "I do"'s forever - oh, up until Scientology con makes her alarmed.
 

[March 2005 -
Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles are to wed.]

In the wedding of Prince Charles and Camilla... ~  sing a mild choral preface: "Candle in the Wind"!

The royal wedding of Prince Charles Windsor to Camilla
= Widower'll confide marriage plan's tiny catch: old horse.

The royal wedding of Prince Charles Windsor to Camilla Parker Bowles
= Small-eared chap (dirt-poor worker)'s now won angelic bride (chaste filly).
 

[January 2005 -
Concerns about terrorism continue. How far are the security measures and paranoia going to go?]

Making terroristic threats
= It's ticking? Roar "Arrest them!"
= Anarchist got striker/timer.
 

[November 2004 -
A study shows that, apparently, 70% of people would willingly trade their computer login password
for a bar of chocolate. Fears are yet again raised about corporate IT security.]

Note: a hacker stole my PC password = Chocolate wrappers sat on my desk.
 

[October 2004 -
Researchers report that four out of 10 medical students believe it can be justified to have a sexual relationship with a patient. Headlines blare out "Doctor–Patient Survey Shock".]

Somewhat rude anagrams on the topic:
Doctor–Patient Survey Shock
= Every scrip had "to suck...". OTT, no?
= Scurvy? Take Hotdoctorpenis.
 

[September 2004 -
Prime Minister Tony Blair is due to undergo catheter ablation surgery for a heart condition.
Some express desires for a, literally, morbid outcome.]

The PM's catheter ablation surgery = Chest tears open! May Blair get hurt!
 

[May 2004 -
Several more countries join the EU.]

Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, Poland, Slovakia, the Czech Republic, Hungary, Malta, Cyprus, and Slovenia
=
Huh?
A Baltic trio, Central European & Slavic land citizens, & islands having a May EU hookup. All pay VAT.

=
Not: Pitcairn; Somalia; Tuvalu; Gaza Strip, Palestine; Kenya; Chad; Holland; Bolivia; church nave, Ely; USA.
 

[February 2004 -
Speculation is rife about what NASA's Mars mission might find. There is much talk of H₂O.
The Spirit rover's mission proceeds notwithstanding a software error, which had been dutifully noted in the device logs as flash memory filled with old file and directory entries. On Mars, the rover continuously tries to reboot, but a low-level deletion run by NASA saves the day, allowing the quest to continue.]

The NASA Spirit Mars rover = Rain, river, stream, hot spas...
(It was intended to "spot their river" after all)
A little software glitch = Log-files alert with tact.

And a couple of predictions, one a bit sillier than the other:
Mars rover Spirit = Storm arrives. RIP.
The NASA Spirit Mars rover = a PR error - natives smash it!
 

[October 2003 -
Magician David Blaine's spectacle of remaining in a perspex box suspended high above London
generates a "ho-hum" response from many critics.]

A Blaine-in-the-box = One banal exhibit!
 

[August 2003 -
Bombing of the UN's building in Baghdad kills more than 20 UN workers, representatives of aid organisations, and guests. Among the dead is a highly respected man whom Kofi Annan regarded as a brother.]

The UN's Sergio Vieira de Mello
= Death over US regime's oil line.
 

[After the 2003 kidnapping of a pizza-delivery worker
the man in question, Brian Wells, with a bomb placed around his neck, follows the kidnappers' orders to rob a bank. As he pleads with the police to save him, some are sceptical of his tale about a bomb. He explodes while the bomb squad are on the way.]

Pizza delivery man Brian Douglas Wells ~
blew up, sadly. "Amazing", zillions averred.
 

The Siamese twins = Site has news item.
 

[At this year's Running of the Bulls
Barcelona again proves to be a touchy subject. The controversial event receives renewed attention,
however, in the days leading up to an international conference to be held there.]

Forum Barcelona is "The Great Meeting for the World We Want"
= Wrath now, once it emerges a bullfighter/matador-free town?
 

[For much of the early part of the year
many health workers toil tirelessly to contain Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome,
containing its spread from China and other hot spots, such as Taiwan.]

The SARS epidemic = Praise the medics!
 

[March 2003 -
Qatar-based Al Jazeera airs footage, shown on Iraqi television, of US soldiers taken as prisoners of war.
If the Geneva Conventions were of great concern, the following conversation might have occurred.]

"Who's in the photos?"  =  "The POWs!"  "Oh, no.  Shit."

This, of course, took place after troops entered Iraq. Various reasons have been offered for the invasion.
Here are a couple of them:

Send the troops! = Shorten despot!
(by a few inches at least)

"Destroy all weapons of mass destruction!"
= "See, fool, I want Saddam's country's petrol!"
 

[February 2003 -
Space Shuttle Columbia disintegrates upon re-entry on the first day of the month. The anagram uses the names of the astronauts who died. It also refers to Judith Resnick, who was among those who died in the Challenger accident, and Gus Grissom was a much earlier casualty of man's desire to explore space.]

Launch is go. Handed cosmic sadness.  -  Brown, Clark, Ramon, ~
Husband, Chawla, Anderson, McCool. And Resnick, Grissom...

Or, for a slightly different emphasis,
Sadness, anguish. Do scold mechanic. - Brown, Clark, Ramon, ~
Husband, Chawla, Anderson, McCool. And Resnick, Grissom...
 

[January 2003 -
The World Health Organization issues an alert warning of potential contamination of food supplies,
after several such attempts are discovered.]

WHO issues alert on food terrorism
= Are donuts or Fritos wholesome, sir?
 

[October 2002 -
The series of sniper attacks in the Washington, DC, area is finally resolved, but not before several further deaths occur. Although the anagram is about an obvious truth of the situation, some might see it as being in poor taste.]

Sniper attacks = Parts in casket.
 

[August 2002 -
Comedian and satirist Chris Morris's television series Brass Eye causes controversy with its episode on paedophiles, for which acritical celebrities were convinced to say some of the most inane things imaginable. The programme was intended as an indictment of the sensationalism surrounding the subject, but many deemed this inappropriate - not least the celebrities who were duped.]

That Brass Eye episode covering pedos
= Deceived sheep are angry so sob "Stop it!"
 

[May 2002 -
Dutch politician Pim Fortuyn is assassinated. The right-wing gay politician's anti-immigration stance had occasioned considerable criticism. Note that no disrespect is intended in the anagram; that's just what the letters yielded. "Fruit" is a slightly dated and non-PC yet non-crude term for a homosexual man.]

Pim Fortuyn dies. = Fruity imp's done.
 

[November 2001 -
Michael Lasseter, desperate to collect his camera from where he left it in a major US airport after he'd passed the security checks etc., evaded guards, jogged against the intended direction of escalators, and so forth. The airline, which cancelled or delayed hundreds of flights during a search for him, files a lawsuit.]

He could avoid future troubles of this sort and pay his legal bills via a single act:
Michael S. Lasseter = Sell shite cameras!
Also, perhaps,
Michael S. Lasseter = Careless male shit.
 

[July–August 2001 -
Sicily's Mount Etna, which made the news in 2000, spews itself into the headlines again.]

Etna's eruption = Nature opens it.
 

[July 2001 -
Metallica's James Hetfield enters a rehabilitation clinic to deal with alcohol abuse.
He describes rehab as one of the scariest experiences of his life.]

Hetfield in rehab = Fit headline here.
Hetfield is placed in rehab. = Panic filled this beer-head.
 

[November 2000 -
A controversial US Presidential election and its aftermath consume the news media's attention.]

Our biggest headlines ~  said "GEORGE BUSH LET IN".
 

[Through much of 2000,
several authors share a conclusion that one William Jefferson Clinton has all the hallmarks of a sex addict.
Claiming to have this medical condition might be a good way of escaping jail time.]

Anxious lad cited ~ sexual addiction.
 

[At various points in 2000,
the "School of the Americas" in Fort Benning, Georgia, makes its way in and out of the news.
The facility has been responsible for providing military training to people who went on to rule over their home countries in Central and South America as tyrants. Its stated goals are laudable enough, but many demonstrators feel that those are only part of the story.]

Fort Benning = Benign front.

School of the Americas
= A coach of some Hitlers.
 

[Stretching back several years,
the tragic events affecting the former Yugoslavia merit anagrammatic attention.]

Yugoslavians = Guys in a salvo.
 

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