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June 2020


4 June 2020

At a coronavirus briefing, Bolivia's Ministry of Health chief Virgilio Pietro reported on three brothers who happened upon a black widow spider while herding goats in the province of Chayanta. The boys, aged 8-12, became excited at the prospect of obtaining powers similar to Spider-Man's, so they poked at the arachnid with a stick, getting it to bite each of them in turn. Their mother found them crying and unwell. After being transferred to three medical facilities in succession, they have emerged without their toxin-induced tremors and fever, and without superpowers.

In another story of biting, 52-year-old Lisa Urso was 'extensively bitten and scratched inside her Ingleside, Illinois, home' before struggling onto her porch, where friends later discovered her mauled body. Her French bulldogs, covered in blood, were still inside. One of the animals, apparently raised as a fighting dog by a previous owner, had been removed from the home and 'put in quarantine' after biting Urso's boyfriend. However, according to Fox Lake Police Chief Jimmy Lee, '[t]he lady wanted her dog back, and it attacked her viciously and killed her'.

Two masked men arrived by stolen car at a Sheetz convenience store in Louisa, Virginia, and made off with alcoholic beverages. Although their faces were obscured, their distinctive appearance led the police to appeal to the public for help in identifying the pair, each of whom wore a hollowed-out watermelon - with eye holes - on his head. One of them has been arrested thus far, Justin M. Rogers, who at age 20 can add under-age possession of alcohol to the charges against him.
Sheetz customer Candice Wendt said this of the labour-intensive melonwear: 'I think it's ridiculous. Innovative but ridiculous.'

Over Facebook, a man living near Griffith, New South Wales, hired two Sydney men to fulfil his partly free-form sex fantasy. The men duly entered the home with machetes in hopes of earning the equivalent of 3,000 euros by doing 'a really good job' However, their quarry was 50 km away - he had moved. The new resident, meanwhile, shouted 'Bugger off - it's too early!' at what he thought was the friend who makes his morning coffee.
The 'wrong person' issue was swiftly resolved, and the apologetic pair left for the client's correct address. Upon arrival, they left the machetes in the car at his request. He was preparing breakfast for three when the police, called by the earlier visitee, arrived.
They arrested both men, for intending to intimidate while armed with an offensive weapon. One of them, Terrence Leroy, has now been found not guilty, with his lawyer having argued that the machete was part of 'a commercial agreement to tie up and stroke a semi-naked man in his underpants with a broom'.

At the end of the night shift, a Canadian ambulance crew were returning to their base when they encountered a person 'clearly in need of assistance'. According to Winnipeg Fire Paramedic Service Chief John Lane, the person in distress began threatening them barely a minute after they pulled over. The ambulance soon was driving off without them.
The crew had pressed the panic button on their radios, which enabled the police to arrive in time to arrest the miscreant - shortly after the ambulance ploughed into a building. The individual in question ended up definitely needing medical treatment.

India's Tribune reports on an attack on a lab technician in Uttar Pradesh, in which the three or four blood samples he was carrying were stolen. His assailants were a group of desperate and hungry monkeys, one of which a video shows later chewing on one of the patient samples while sitting in a tree. Speaking for Meerut Medical College, Dr S.K. Garg reported that new samples were drawn from all of the affected COVID-19 patients.

[IMG: some of the shoes at the police station]After dozens of complaints from residents of Nonthaburi, central Thailand, about their shoes going missing, the town's increased CCTV presence paid off with the identification of 24-year-old Theerapat Klaiya as the culprit. He confessed to having stolen 126 pairs of flip-flops over the last two years. Klaiya explained that he liked to wear the items in his collection around the house, then cuddle with them and 'have sex with them'. He has been charged with 'night-time theft and snatching, possessing a digital transceiver without permission, and violating the coronavirus curfew'.

Meanwhile in Singapore, Lee Chee Kin was out on bail while awaiting a trial date for underwear theft when he crept into a neighbour's back garden where women's underthings were hanging invitingly. While he was trying to select suitable bras and knickers, the homeowner rang the police. A 31st case of lingerie theft has now been added to the tally. The 39-year-old man is charged also with leaving his residence without a good reason during the city-state's lockdown, theft, criminal trespass, and failing to wear a mask outside.

Also in Singapore, Malaysian man Punithan Genasan was convicted of planning and executing a large-scale heroin deal, and he has now been sentenced to death. What raised some eyebrows and hackles is not so much the nature of the punishment as the judge's passing of sentence via a Zoom video call, while in-person meetings in Singapore remain subject to coronavirus-related restrictions. The 37-year-old man's attorney, while hoping to appeal the ruling, did not object to this manner of announcing that his client is to be hanged.

In one of those 'delayed mail' news items, Indiana's Janice Tucker described finally receiving a letter that her brother sent to her, at a different address, 52 years ago. She rang her brother, who recalled handing the envelope to a fellow soldier in Vietnam for posting. Tucker hopes to find and thank whoever tracked her down, and she has already thanked her brother 'for being a big brother that I didn't really love and appreciate until I got older'.
Also recently, a Canadian man recently received the tube of Brylcreem he'd ordered online while testing hair products back in 2012. His review of the product consists of the comment that it has gone decidedly yellow. Canada Post are investigating its journey.


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