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Torchwood transcripts - series 1
Episode 9: Random Shoes
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TORCHWOOD
1X09: RANDOM SHOES
ORIGINAL AIR DATE IN UK: 12/10/2006
TRANSCRIBED FROM DL
Written by: JACQUETTA MAY
Directed by: JAMES ERSKINE
Transcript by Intrepid
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SUMMARY: Gwen investigates the death of Eugene Jones.
==========================
TORCHWOOD
1X09: RANDOM SHOES
==========================
FADE IN:
[INTRODUCTION]
JACK HARKNESS: (v.o.) Torchwood. Outside the Government, beyond the Police.
Tracking down alien life on Earth and arming the human race against the future. The 21st
century is when everything changes, and you've got to be ready.
FADE IN:
BLURRY LIGHTS
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) The speed of light is 299,792,458 meters per second. Pain
travels through the body at 350 feet per second. Even a sneeze can reach 100 mph.
FADE TO:
EXT. ROAD – DAY
(TOP VIEW DOWN: A man lies stretched out on the middle of the road.
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) And as for life, well, that just bloody whizzes by.
(We ZOOM down Eugene Jones on the road. His eyes are open and he looks around.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) So then, this is me, Eugene Jones.
(Eugene turns and slowly sits up. It’s as if he doesn’t know where he is let
alone how he got there.)
(Eugene stands up and looks both ways. He starts walking. Eugene walks a little down the
road and comes across a black SUV parked on the side.)
(We hear sounds filtering in – police radio chatter. And we see crime scene tape. An
officer holds the tape up as someone exits the scene. Eugene walks into the crime scene
area.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Hey, Gwen. Jack! Er, Tosh ... The guys at the rope just let
me through so ...
(He walks over to Jack, Gwen and Toshiko standing near the body on the side of the road.
Soco is there gathering evidence.)
GWEN: I'd say at least fifty miles per hour.
JACK: Traveled on the bonnet, bounced, maybe rolled, smashed his face on the road.
(Gwen kneels next to the body on the grass.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Hey? Um, excuse me, but that looks a lot like me.
(Sure enough, it does look like Eugene. So far, no one as acknowledged Eugene’s
presence.)
TOSHIKO: He couldn't even cross the road without messing it up.
(Jack kneels down near the body.)
GWEN: No bag - nothing. I mean, what was he doing here? Perhaps he was hit
deliberately ... maybe he really did have something important.
TOSHIKO: Like what?
GWEN: I don't know. He was always trying to talk to us, show us stuff. Perhaps we
shouldn't have been so ...
TOSHIKO: Gwen, I think it's just an ordinary RTA.
(Jack looks at the body’s hands.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (interrupts) Guys?
JACK: It was a red car. There's red paint under his fingernails.
(Eugene takes a step closer toward the body.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Am I dead?
(He looks at Toshiko with her back to him. He puts a hand out and it goes clear through
her. He pulls his arm back, stunned. He takes a couple steps back as he looks at them.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Am I dead?
(Eugene looks around at any of the other officers there.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Am I dead?
SMASH TO:
END OF TEASER
ROLL TITLE CREDITS
FADE IN:
EXT. ROADSIDE -- DAY
(A phone in the grass rings. Toshiko picks it up and checks it.)
TOSHIKO: (to phone) Yes?
BRONWEN JONES: (from phone) Hello, love. I've just been to the shops and forgot
tea-bags.
(Toshiko holds the phone out to Gwen who takes it.)
BRONWEN JONES: (from phone) Hello ... ? Eugene?
(Gwen glances at the ID.)
GWEN: (to phone) Hi, Mrs Jones. Something's happened. We need to talk to you.
(Eugene stares at his body on the grass.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) What happened? How did I end up here? I mean, I'm dead, but
I'm not dead. So ... Shit!
(Eugene follows Gwen and Toshiko back to the SUV.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) So, what? Am I a ghost or a zombie? Oh, God. Right, calm.
(Gwen opens the door and looks back at Jack.)
GWEN: Yeah?
INT. TORCHWOOD SUV (PARKED) -- CONTINUOUS
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) Stick with the team.
(Jack points to the car. Gwen holds the door open as she looks at Jack. Eugene climbs into
the back seat.)
GWEN: (to Jack) What? You're driving.
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) This is Torchwood, it's going to be okay.
(Gwen and Jack get in the car. Eugene looks at the rear view mirror and finds he has no
reflection. It shocks him for a moment.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) Oh, what?! Of course, I'm invisible. Why am I invisible?
(Gwen checks Eugene’s phone.)
JACK: Anything on his phone from today?
(She finds photos of shoes.)
GWEN: Just some pictures of random shoes.
(She shakes her head and closes the phone. Gwen turns and looks at the empty seat next to
her.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) Mind you, it feels kinda familiar. You know what, whatever's
happened, all of a sudden, I'm somewhere I've always wanted to be.
EXT. ROAD -- CONTINUOUS
(The Torchwood SUV pulls out and drives away from the scene.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) Let's back up a bit. I mean, every story's got a beginning. I
think mine began here ...
FADE TO WHITE:
FADE IN:
INT. AUDITORIUM -- DAY
(The audience applauds.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) The final of the Interschool Maths Competition, 1992.
(The panel sits on the stage. We linger on a young EUGENE JONES who sits in abject defeat
at his panel’s table.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) I used to be a maths head. Binary coding, topology,
quadratics, I loved stuff like that. And I'm supposed to be really good at it.
MODERATOR: -- and Rushmore, a mountainous 42 ... So we congratulate the winning
team – Rushmore ...
(The audience applauds.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) Dad took the day off work to come and see me, but when the
moment mattered, I blanked, let the side down, made a mess of it.
(Eugene’s dad holds the video camera and puts it down. Poor Eugene looks really sad
at the loss.)
CUT TO:
INT. SCIENCE CLASSROOM – LATER
(The kids grab their things. Young Eugene Jones remains sitting at the lab table.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) Everyone blamed me for losing the final ... but it must have
been what happened afterwards that started this whole thing off.
(Mr. Garrett enters the classroom and finds Young Eugene Jones despondent and alone.)
MR. GARRETT: Have you ever had a proper look at the collection?
YOUNG EUGENE JONES: No, sir.
MR. GARRETT: Would you like to?
YOUNG EUGENE JONES: No, sir.
MR. GARRETT: I play golf.
YOUNG EUGENE JONES: Oh. Good, sir.
MR. GARRETT: I play golf. And one day when I was playing really badly ...
(He opens the cabinet.)
MR. GARRETT: I was stuck in the first bunker whacking away at all the sand ...
(He takes out a small round object.)
MR. GARRETT: ..and this fell out of the sky, and landed - plop! - beside me.
(Young Eugene Jones’ interest is piqued.)
YOUNG EUGENE JONES: From the sky?
MR. GARRETT: Yeah. It looks a bit like a golf ball, so I picked it up and put it in
my pocket. But when I had a proper look later ... Here.
(He gives the round object to Young Eugene.)
MR. GARRETT: I realized it was an eye. And I thought, well, "Where could that
have come from?" It fell from the sky. Isn't that amazing?
(He leans forward.)
MR. GARRETT: Have it.
(As Young Eugene looks at the eye, the blue part moves and swirls.)
(Mr. Garrrett steps away.)
(The classroom door opens and Mr. Jones walks in.)
SHAUN JONES: (exasperated) Where the bloody hell have you been?!
MR. GARRETT: Good evening.
SHAUN JONES: (to Mr. Garrett) Good evening. (to Eugene) Come on, Eugene.
(Young Eugene grabs his bag and heads out.)
MR. GARRETT: Have you got everything?
(Young Eugene shows Mr. Garrett the eye.)
YOUNG EUGENE JONES: Yes. Thanks, sir.
(Young Eugene leaves the classroom.)
CUT TO:
INT. JONES RESIDENCE – DAY
(Mr. Jones is screaming at his wife. They’re in the midst of an argument while Young
Eugene calmly studies the eye.)
SHAUN JONES: (yelling) I went to the school, didn't I!
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) Dad was mad at me for losing the final. But now I had the eye.
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. JONES RESIDENCE – EUGENE’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
(The moon and stars.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) And what I realized was, if it fell from the sky, it probably
...
(While in bed, Young Eugene studies the moon and stars painted on his ceiling. In the
background, his parents continue to argue loudly.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) No ... No, it almost certainly belonged to an alien.
(The loud arguing continues. The front door slams. Young Eugene gets out of bed and looks
out the window.)
(He sees his dad head for the car. Eugene knocks on the glass window trying to get his
dad’s attention. The dad gets into the car and drives away.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) That was the night Dad went away. But it was okay, because I
had the eye, and the possibility of an alien encounter.
(Eugene goes to his shelf to pick up the eye and look at it.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) I mean, if you leave something really important behind, you
come back and get it. Don't you?
(Eugene looks through the telescope he has set up in his room.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) I wanted that alien to come back and claim his eye more than I
wanted anything in my life.
INSERT: VARIOUS PLANETS SWOOSH BY AS HE MOVES THROUGH OUTER SPACE
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) I worked out the possible provenance, the life form and
galaxy, planetary escape velocities, launch windows, necessary fuel capacities, and then,
I waited.
(We pass through the flames of the sun as we pass by.)
LYRICS: (v.o.) There's a star man waiting in the sky. He'd like to come and meet
us but he thinks he'll blow our minds.
(The sun DISSOLVES INTO the eye. Various blue planets move by as the eye travels through
outer space.)
LYRICS: (v.o.) There's a star man waiting in the sky. He's told us not to ...
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. DOCKS – LATE EVENING (PAST)
(Eugene stands outside the crime scene tape. Officers walk in and out of the area.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) My dad never came back. As I got older, I became interested in
UFOs, collected alien artifacts, watched the stars and waited alone for my alien.
(He turns around and the black Torchwood SUV arrives at the scene.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) And then, I found you, Gwen Cooper.
(Gwen gets out of the SUV. Eugene is trying to get her attention as she goes to the back
of the SUV to get her things.)
EUGENE JONES: (stammering) Hi, I'm Eugene Jones and, er, I have a keen interest in
your work and, er ... I've got something to ... I'd just like to – I’d just like
to show, uh ...
(Eugene takes some papers out of his bag. The others head for the scene.)
GWEN: Hi.
EUGENE JONES: Hi.
JACK: (o.s.) Gwen!
EUGENE JONES: Okay, what it is ... uh, I’ve got – these, these --
GWEN: Look, I've got to go.
(Gwen ducks under the crime scene tape. Eugene follow and loses his hold on his papers.)
EUGENE JONES: Look, uh, please, please –
(The papers fly away with the wind. Eugene stays behind the tape.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) But I couldn't quite make contact.
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. – NIGHT (PAST)
(Owen and Gwen are headed back to the SUV. Eugene steps out from behind the corner and
approaches them. Owen rolls his eyes.)
OWEN: Hmm, you again.
(He ignores Eugene. Eugene sticks with Gwen.)
EUGENE JONES: Gwen, I've got this thing I really need to show you.
(Gwen opens the car door and gets inside.)
EUGENE JONES: Sorry, that sounded ...
(She closes the car door on him, ignoring him.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) I couldn't get you interested in the eye, no matter how hard I
tried.
(Eugene watches as the SUV leaves. Eugene turns and walks away.)
WHITE FLASH TO:
INT. JONES RESIDENCE – DAY (PRESENT)
(Gwen and the others break the news to Eugene’s mom.)
BRONWEN JONES: Are you sure it's my Eugene?
(She turns and looks at Gwen. Eugene, the ghost, is standing right next to Gwen. Gwen nods
back at her solemnly.)
GWEN: Yes, Mrs. Jones.
BRONWEN JONES: Perhaps you couldn't really identify him.
GWEN: We could.
(Ghost Eugene steps away. Bronwen Jones starts to cry. She looks at the table.)
BRONWEN JONES: That's his tea there.
(She looks a the dinner plate on the pot on the stove.)
CUT TO:
INT. JONES RESIDENCE – EUGENE’S ROOM – DAY – CONTINUOUS
(Owen and Ianto look at Eugene’s things. Owen picks up a magazine and flips through
it. Ghost Eugene walks into the room.)
(Owen puts the magazine back on the stack on the table and knocks the stack over.)
OWEN: Shit!
(Eugene quietly kneels to pick it up, but then remembers that he’s a ghost and
can’t grab anything.)
(Owen picks up a pamphlet,
"Black Holes and the Uncertainty Principle,"
Dr. Louise Nagli, FRS
Dr. William Spencer
(He sighs.)
OWEN: What are we doing here?
(Ianto opens the display cabinet door.)
IANTO: Look at this.
(Owen looks at the shelf with various labeled items on it.)
CUT TO:
INT. JONES RESIDENCE – LIVING ROOM – CONTINUOUS
(Gwen sits on the couch next to Terry Jones as she questions Eugene’s younger
brother.)
GWEN: Do you understand what's happened to your brother, Terry?
TERRY JONES: Yeah.
GWEN: What?
TERRY JONES: He walked into a road and got run over.
(He’s watching the elephant on the television.)
GWEN: Where's your dad?
TERRY JONES: He works for a big corporation in America.
(Owen appears in the doorway. He motions for her.)
OWEN: Gwen?
(Gwen gets up. She puts a hand on Terry’s shoulder as she follows Owen.)
INT. JONES RESIDENCE – EUGENE’S ROOM – DAY -- CONTINUOUS
(Gwen picks up an item off the display cabinet shelf. Eugene is standing )
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): That's pre-Gorgon Pilurian currency. I had them
authenticated.
(Gwen looks at Owen.)
GWEN: Are these Roman coins?
(Owen is looking at another item.)
OWEN: Hey, look, Rice Krispies. Man, there are some rogues out there.
(Gwen turns to the shelf and notices an empty display stand.)
GWEN: Oh, hang on, there's something missing here.
(Bronwen Jones walks in.)
GWEN: Mrs. Jones, do you know what's missing from Eugene's collection?
BRONWEN JONES: Why didn't they stop? They killed my boy and just drove on ...
(Gwen puts the display stand down.)
SHORT TIME CUT TO:
INT. JONES RESIDENCE – FRONT DOOR -- DAY
(Mrs. Jones stands in the doorway as Owen and Gwen are leaving with boxes of Eugene’s
things.)
OWEN: Excuse me.
(Owen walks past her. Mrs. Jones starts to cry again.)
GWEN: I am sorry, Mrs. Jones.
(Gwen nods and leaves with a smaller box. Eugene looks at his mom.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Look, Mum, I'm sorry, but we've got the best team ever
working on this. Torchwood, me - top! We'll get it sorted, Mum.
(Mrs. Jones continues to cry. She steps into the house. Eugene lingers.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): See, I think there's probably been some mistake. So, uh, ...
So ... (quickly) I gotta go.
(Eugene turns and leaves. We holds on Mrs. Jones.)
CUT TO:
EXT. MILLENNIUM CENTRE (STOCK) -- DAY
(Zoom down to the water tower in the center.)
INT. TORCHWOOD – HUB -- DAY
(The cog door rolls open as the alarms blare and lights flash. Owen, Gwen and Ianto return
with Eugene’s boxes.)
GWEN: I want to know what he last ate, where he'd been ...
(Eugene follows them inside.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Oh, wow!
(He looks around the place in awe.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): This is ... This is ... I am totally ...
(He turns and sees the head and hand in containers.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Christ almighty! The Head of Vexor 11. No way! And ... Wow! A
hand ... in a jar.
INT. TORCHWOOD – WORKSTATIONS – CONTINUOUS
(Gwen puts the box she’s carrying down on the coffee table.)
GWEN: What was he doing out on that road?
OWEN: Fuck knows. Categorizing chevrons. He was a geek.
(Eugene the Ghost is still in awe as he heads through the workstations.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Ah, this is truly legendary.
(Gwen heads down to autopsy as Owen follows her. Eugene’s body is already on the
table under a sheet.)
OWEN: Gwen, he had a bit of a thing about you, and now you're feeling guilty.
GWEN: Sod off, Owen.
OWEN: You do it, then.
GWEN: I do it? The autopsy?
OWEN: Yes. I've got a stack of admin.
GWEN: Okay. Good.
OWEN: You're sure?
GWEN: Yes.
OWEN: Really?
GWEN: Yes.
(Eugene the Ghost is still in the workstations area.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): I am in heaven.
(He looks around --
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Am I?
-- and heads down into the autopsy area.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Is that ... ?
(Gwen opens the body bag to show Eugene’s dead body inside.)
OWEN: Number three scalpel. Start at the sternum. Piece of piss.
(Sure enough, Gwen has the scalpel in her hand.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Okay, here we go. This is also new to me, but in an
investigation like this ...
(Gwen puts the scalpel point on Dead Eugene’s chest. Ghost Eugene promptly faints.)
(Gwen gets ready to cut when --
IANTO: Okay, a red Vauxhall has been stopped outside Caernarfon. Very drunk guy has
admitted knocking a man over near Cardiff. Fit's Eugene's description. The man says he
thought he'd be okay, so he drove on. Ah, he was a sweet guy. That's very sad.
OWEN: Now, can we get on with some proper work, please?
(Gwen doesn’t say anything. We hold on Gwen.)
FADE OUT
INT. TORCHWOOD – COLD STORAGE – DAY
(Eugene wakes up. His body is still on the autopsy table. Eugene gets up and walks over to
Owen who is sitting at his workstation eating an apple.)
FADE OUT.
INT. EUGENE YOUNG’S HOME – NIGHT
(Bronwen stands by her living room window and cries. Eugene is outside, walking up the
front path. He stops outside the window and watches hi mother cry for him.)
INT. TORCHWOOD – CONFERENCE ROOM -- NIGHT
(Gwen is troubled by something.)
GWEN: Do you think Eugene committed suicide?
(Toshiko and Jack are examining an item.)
TOSHIKO: It was a road accident and there was no alien involved.
GWEN: See, I'm not so sure because something seems really odd. I mean, I just ... I
just feel that there's something going on.
OWEN: (scoffs) Marvelous. Thank you for that Disney moment. Now, who's making the
tea?
GWEN: I suppose Eugene's a bit odd and a real local and amateur for you.
OWEN: Why is it that only Gwen seems to have a heart? I don't know if you've
noticed but the rest of us are human and amazingly we still manage to get on with our
jobs.
JACK: Okay, you two ...
GWEN: Okay, fine. Leave it, forget it.
OWEN: I have.
CUT TO:
EXT. MILLENNIUM CENTRE (STOCK) -- DAY
(Owen sits at his workstation watching a program on all his monitors while reading a file.
Gwen notices and walks up to him.)
GWEN: Is that Eugene's DVD?
OWEN: No. Yes! It was on loan from a video store.
GWEN: You were nicking his stuff?
OWEN: I was going to take it back.
(He takes the disc out.)
GWEN: I'll do it.
OWEN: Suits me. (She takes the disc.) There'll be a fine.
(Owen turns his back to her and sits back in his chair to read his file.)
(Gwen puts the DVDs on her workstation counter. She puts a plastic bag marked CONTENTS OF
POCKET in a box. She looks at the second plastic package with Eugene’s phone in it
and tucks it in her bag.)
GWEN: I'm going to go for some lunch.
OWEN: (waves) All right.
INT. DINER – DAY
(Gwen walks into the diner. She walks up to the owner.)
GWEN: Hi. Do you know when the video shop round the corner opens?
CAFÉ OWNER: No, he's a law unto himself.
(Eugene walks into the diner, excited to see Gwen.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Gwen! What are you doing here?
(Gwen looks around.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): This is my lunch cafe. This is ...
GWEN: (to café owner) Do you know someone called Eugene Jones?
(The Café Owner walks up to her.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): That's me! That's me.
GWEN: Middle height. Sandy hair. Ordinary looking ...
CAFÉ OWNER: (shakes his head) Nope. What can I do for you?
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): I come in here every day. Two eggs, ham and chips. Everyday.
GWEN: Two eggs, ham and chips, please.
(Gwen turns and sits at the table. Eugene follows her to the table.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): So ... So ... Wow, this is so weird. I used to follow YOU
around.
(Gwen takes out the plastic bag with Eugene’s phone in it. She takes out his phone.
Eugene sits down next to Gwen.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Now you're following me!
(Gwen looks at the photos on the camera phone. Eugene looks over her shoulder.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Yeah. (shakes his head) No, you see, I don't know whose those
are. I can't remember anything, except ... Phone Gary. He might know something.
(Gwen finds GARY in the contact list and DIALS.)
(The phone rings.)
GARY: (answering machine) Hi, this is Gary. Please leave a message.
GWEN: (to phone) Hi, my name is Gwen Cooper. I have some very bad news for you,
Gary. I'll give you a call back later.
(The café owner puts the plate down in front of Gwen. Eugene leans in close and smells
the meal with longing.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): That is so beautiful.
CUT TO:
INT. VIDEO STORE – DAY
(The video store is empty of people.)
TV VIDEO: These ancient creatures have had their day.
(Gwen walks in with Eugene behind her.)
TV VIDEO: All over these lush fern prairies a grim evolutionary battle has broken
out among the newer types of reptile ...
(The video store clerk pops up from behind the counter.)
GWEN: Hello.
JOSH: Hi, gorgeous. Want to borrow a dream?
GWEN: No, thank you. I want to return some DVDs on behalf of someone who's
deceased.
JOSH: Deceased? No shit. That's pretty final.
GWEN: Eugene Jones.
JOSH: Hey, I think he used to come in here, with a mate. Bit of a dreamer, kind of
...
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Irresistible?
JOSH: Ordinary looking. Yeah.
GWEN: He was killed in a road accident.
(He rings it up.)
JOSH: That's bad. Sweet guy. £34, please.
GWEN: £34?!
JOSH: Yeah. Sorry. He's had 'em out ages. I haven't seen him in months. I don't
think I can bend the rules, just cos he's dead.
(Eugene looks over the counter at the cash register.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Bread-head bastard. Sorry, Gwen.
GWEN: That's okay.
JOSH: Did he, er ... ? Did he walk into the oncoming traffic? See, lot a people
come in here. They don't want to be themselves any more, they want to be someone else.
They want me to transport them. How about you, baby?
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Oh, leave it out.
GWEN: I'm fine, thank you. How about you?
JOSH: Me? I'm outta here. Moving to London in a couple of months. You know what I'm
saying? You see, no disrespect, but Eugene had "loser" written through him like
"Brighton" in a stick of rock. Maybe he just couldn't live with his ... failure.
You wanna write a check?
CUT TO:
EXT. CARDIFF CITY (STOCK) – DAY
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) Failure? Is that right? Has my life just been one big
failure?
INT. PASSMORE TELESALES BUILDING -- ELEVATOR -- DAY
(Eugene follows Gwen into the elevator.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) I mean, maybe I never quite lived up to my early
promises of maths genius, but that's because I was waiting for the alien to collect his
eye and change my life.
(Gwen presses the button and the doors close.)
INT. PASSMORE TELESALES -- HALLWAY – CONTINUOUS
(Gwen and Eugene walk out of the elevator.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) And while I was waiting, I joined Passmore Telesales.
(Eugene looks arou8nd the company area.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Oh, yes. This is all nauseatingly familiar.
(Eugene looks around.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) Selling kitchens, home insurance, barbeque sets.
Selling life and ... still waiting.
(Gwen checks the phone pictures of shoes and looks for a matching pair in the office.)
(Eugene walks past co-workers he recognizes.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Jason! Kevin! You’re the guy with the personal hygiene
problem. Nothing changes, really. (to the girl) Hi, Morag. (to Gwen) Me and Morag used to
go out.
(Gwen finds the person wearing the shoes on Eugene’s phone.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) So, how come I can remember the details of my
fascinating daily life, but the vital couple of weeks before I died are still a complete
mystery to me?
(Gary is at the water cooler getting a cup of water. Gwen walks up to him.)
GWEN: Are you Gary?
GARY: Yeah, yeah. How do you, er ... ? Are you ...
GWEN: Gwen, yes. I was just wondering whether you saw Eugene the day he died.
GARY: No. Sorry.
(A co-worker hands him a card.)
GARY: Just doing a card. You know ... (reads) "Good luck in your new
job"?! He's dead.
CO-WORKER: No! Who's it for, then?
GARY: His mum, you idiot! Shit.
CO-WORKER: (upset) Can you rub it out? It's in Biro. (He walks past Gwen.) People
just don't understand!
(Eugene and Gwen follow him out.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Don't worry, mate, it's okay.
(Gwen is stopped by a woman.)
LINDA: Is it true? He got run over?
GWEN: Yeah.
LINDA: Oh, God. Sorry. I'm Linda. I'm a Silver Seller.
(She starts to cry. Gwen hands her a tissue.)
LINDA: It's all about belief, see? If necessary, I am Kitchens For A Lifetime.
Eugene was only ever himself.
GWEN: He wasn't the best salesman then?
LINDA: No. I think Craig kept him on out of the goodness of his heart. Have you met
Craig?
GWEN: Is he your boss? Are you two an item?
(Linda nods.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): A snog in the ladies' at the Christmas party.
LINDA: (whispers) But I can't talk about it here cos of Craig's, you know ...
position.
GWEN: Do you want to meet lunchtime for a chat?
(Linda nods.)
GWEN: Okay. Where does Gary sit?
LINDA: Number 50.
GWEN: Okay, thank you. Thanks.
(Gwen stands up and heads for cubicle #50. It’s empty. Gwen sits down in the chair.)
(Her phone rings.)
GWEN: (to phone) Owen.
OWEN: (from phone) Gwen, Jack wants to know where you are.
(Gwen finds a flyer for "BLACK HOLES AND THE UNCERTAINTY PRINCIPLE" on
Gary’s desk.)
GWEN: Yeah, sorry. I had a few things to sort out. I'll be back later.
OWEN: Yeah, well, make it quick.
(She hangs up. She stands up and folds the flyer.)
CUT TO:
INT. DINER – DAY
(Gwen talks with Linda. Eugene hangs around, listening.)
LINDA: Well, one day Eugene came in, very low.
GWEN: Why? Why was he low?
LINDA: He wouldn't talk about it. Anyway, I was fed up too because Craig had ...
Well, anyway, I said, I'd love to get away from it all and go to Australia. Eugene
suddenly got very excited. He said, "Yes! You've got to go." I said, "But I
haven't got the money," and he said he'd get it for me.
GWEN: So he was going to pay for a ticket for you to go to Australia with him? Was
he in love with you?
(Eugene sits down.)
LINDA: Oh, no! He loved someone he said was unattainable. He was just trying to
look after me. He said, "Don't stay here and waste your life waiting for something
that may never happen."
GWEN: Where was he going to get the money from?
LINDA: Exactly.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): You said, "You haven't bought socks in six years."
LINDA: I said, "You haven't even had a new pair of socks in six years."
He stood up, and he said ...
(Gwen’s phone rings.)
LINDA: That's your phone.
(Gwen checks it, then turns back to Linda.)
GWEN: Yeah, he said...?
LINDA: He said, "I'm going to sell it." I said, "What?" He
said, "My alien artifact."
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): So...?
GWEN: So...?
LINDA: So he brought it in to work.
(Quick flashback to: [OFFICE] Eugene shows his alien eye to Gary, Linda and a co-worker.)
CO-WORKER: It's a plastic eye!
EUGENE JONES: It's an alien body part, and I'm going to sell it on eBay.
LINDA: Eugene, it's very nice of you, but I don't think that's going to get me the
bus into town, let alone a flight to Sydney.
(Eugene doesn’t say anything.)
(End of flashback.)
LINDA: Some people laughed. But he went ahead, and of course, it just sat there.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): She said maybe a photo, a bit more of a description ...
LINDA: Then, out of the blue - £2.50. A kid from Birmingham. And then ...
(Quick flashback to: [OFFICE] Gary is in his cubicle looking at the site.)
GARY: Eugene, you got a couple more bids. Bloody hell! 75 quid!
(Eugene looks at the site. Sure enough, £75. As he watches, the bid goes higher and
higher.)
LINDA: That was just the beginning. 200 ... 300 ... 1, 000... They just kept on
going up.
(End of flashback.)
LINDA: £3,000! For a spare body part. Pete said you can get a bathroom suite with
a celebrity appearance for less than that! Then one day, it just ... jumped.
(Quick flash to: [OFFICE] The bid goes from £3,000 to £15,000.)
LINDA: Oh, my God, Eugene, you're rich!
(At the last minute, it jumps again £15,005.50.)
(Linda stands back and applauds him.)
(End of flashback.)
LINDA: £15,005.50.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Who bought it?
GWEN: Who bought it?
LINDA: I've no idea. Is it all my fault?
GWEN: Of course it's not!
(Gwen’s phone rings. She answers it.)
GWEN: (to Linda) I'm sorry. (to phone) Hello?
BRONWEN JONES: (from phone) Hi, it's Eugene's mum.
GWEN: Mrs. Jones?
BRONWEN JONES: (from phone) There's something I think you should see.
GWEN: Okay. I'll come over. (She hangs up.) That was Eugene's mum. Sorry, I'm going
to have to go. I'm sorry.
(Gwen gets up and leaves. Linda takes a drink from her glass.)
CUT TO:
INT. JONES RESIDENCE – LIVING ROOM – DAY
(Bronwen Jones and Gwen watch the video tape of Eugene at his Maths Final. Eugene sits in
the dining room watching in the back.)
SHAUN JONES: (from video) There he is ... my son at the Interschool Maths Final.
Big moment. Youngest contestant in Wales.
MODERATOR: (from video) So, it's down to the wire, the last question will settle
the final. What curve is represented by y-squared = 4ax?
SHAUN JONES: (from video) Come on. You got a brain the size of Cardiff Arms Park!
What's the friggin' problem?!
MODERATOR: What curve is represented by y-squared = 4ax?
SHAUN JONES: (from video) Don't do this. Don't let me down, boy.
MODERATOR: No?
(The bell dings.)
MODERATOR: Time's up. No additional points. The final scores are ...
(She turns the television set off.)
GWEN: I don't understand. Someone gave him the eye as a consolation prize?
BRONWEN JONES: Yeah, it was that Mr. Garrett, the science teacher. A plastic eye!
As a consolation prize! Still, Eugene treasured it.
(Terry walks in.)
TERRY JONES: That was the night Dad walked out.
BRONWEN JONES: Went away.
TERRY JONES: You can stop now, Mum.
BRONWEN JONES: What do you mean?
TERRY JONES: He's dead. He may have been able to square the root of the square
root, but he couldn't cross the road!
BRONWEN JONES: Terry! Please!
GWEN: He sold the eye online. So something must have happened.
TERRY JONES: Dad left when he found out Eugene was a failure. That's what Eugene
said.
BRONWEN JONES: That's not true. He went cos of his job. He has a very important
job.
GWEN: Does Mr. Jones know about Eugene?
BRONWEN JONES: Well, you see, he works for a big corporation in America.
TERRY JONES: Stop giving us that shit! He's not Superman, Mum! He works at a garage
on Filey Road. Eugene found him about two weeks ago. He found him on the internet. He's a
cashier. Works nights.
(Mrs. Jones starts to cry again.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) Oh, God, now I remember why I sold the eye.
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. CARDIFF CITY LIGHTS (STOCK) – NIGHT
EXT. FILEY ROAD – NIGHT
(Gwen pulls up her car to the curb, license #HN06 KZO.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) Life can be such a let down, can't it? All those years
I'd believed my dad had gone to America because I was a failure. And here he was, all
along, doing his important secret work in Filey Road, Cardiff. When I found him, I
couldn't even bear to say hello.
(Gwen turns and watches Shawn Jones exit the store.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) I'd spent my life believing in stupid stories,
fantasies. I've wasted my life. Once I'd seen him there, everything I'd dreamed about was
like rubbish, just a crock of shit, including the eye.
(Gwen unbuckles her seatbelt.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): So why not sell it? Along with the woodworm treatment and
loft insulation, and all the other crap floating round the world. Linda was welcome to the
money.
(She starts to get out of the car.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): No! No! NO! Don't, Gwen!
(She stops and closes the door.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): I don't want anything to do with him. I'm sorry.
GWEN: It's okay.
(Gwen puts her seatbelt back on.)
FADE OUT TO:
EXT. CARDIFF CITY LIGHTS (STOCK) – NIGHT
INT. TORCHWOOD – NIGHT
(Gwen takes Eugene’s plastic bag out of the box and puts it her bag. Eugene is
standing just behind her. Jack walks up to her.)
JACK: You turned your phone off.
(Gwen and Eugene sit down.)
GWEN: It was Eugene. He didn't understand why his father left. He just needs a bit
of help.
JACK: To do what? He's dead!
GWEN: Yes, Jack, I know he's dead, but ...
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): This is not sounding good, Gwen.
JACK: I've got work to do.
(Jack turns and leaves.)
GWEN: Okay.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Eh? No. You can't just stop. I mean, what about the £15,000?
Gwen? Gwen!
(Gwen suddenly gets to her feet.)
GWEN: (to Jack) Okay. Listen to this. Eugene had an alien eye in his collection. He
sold it online.
(Jack turns around, suddenly interested.)
JACK: What, like a sixth eye? A Dogon sixth eye?
GWEN: Maybe.
JACK: It's possible. There was a trade in them. Who's got it?
GWEN: I don't know, but I've nearly tracked it down. What exactly is a sixth eye? I
mean, exactly?
JACK: It's one in the back. Let's you see behind you, where you've been. Kind of
puts things in perspective. It's useful, fun, slightly terrifying, that's why they were in
demand.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): See? See? I told you.
GWEN: I can get it for you.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): My alien ... See? See?
JACK: Okay, you've got the weekend. But keep your phone on.
(Jack leaves.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): God, you are brilliant. And I'm brilliant too.
(Gwen opens the flyer and looks at it. The flyer is put out by:
N. WALES ASTRONOMY SOCIETY CONVENTION
ABERYSTWYTH UNIVERSITY
SCIENCE AND NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM )
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Oh, yeah, of course, Gary and me were going to go to that
talk in Aberystwyth.
CUT TO:
EXT. ROAD (STOCK) – DAY
(Gwen drivers her car along the road.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) Black holes and anti-matter were pretty important to
me and Gary, --
INT. GWEN’S CAR (MOVING) – DAY
(Eugene smiles as he looks at Gwen.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) -- but if I'm going to spend a night by the sea, I
know who I'd rather be with. I'd trust you with my life if, you know, I still had one.
(Eugene closes his eyes and smiles.)
INT. ABERYSTWYTH UNIVERSITY – SCIENCE AND NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM – DAY
(Gwen walks across the lobby. Eugene follows her. He takes a moment and looks up at the
ceiling of the large building.)
(Gwen stands in line.)
(Gwen is on the second floor and finds Gary looking at a display.)
GWEN: Gary?
(He looks at her, then runs. Puzzled, Gwen goes after him. Gary stops running.)
GARY: I'm not proud of what I've done.
TIME CUT TO:
(Gwen and Gary talk while Eugene listens nearby.)
GWEN: You hiked the bid?
GARY: I created three or four online aliases, and used them to inflate the price.
GWEN: But why?
GARY: At first, just to cheer him up. He was miserable. But then the bidding took
off and we got ... I mean, I ... was involved at first. I was just helping Eugene make
money, and then one morning ...
(Quick flash to: [OFFICE STAIRS] Eugene rushes down the stairs looking for --
EUGENE JONES: Gary!
(Eugene finds Gary smoking a cigarette.)
EUGENE JONES: Gary, I think it's him.
GARY: Who?
EUGENE JONES: The alien. My alien. I think he's come back to claim what's
rightfully his. Gary, I'd stopped believing in him. I mean, I thought I was just a total
sucker but ... who else would be bidding this kind of money for a prosthetic eye? He
couldn't contact me any other way. So --
GARY: So he chose eBay?
EUGENE JONES: Cyberspace. I mean, even an online auction has a certain elegant
symmetry. I think I'm finally going to meet him.
(End of flashback.)
GARY: Well, I was doubtful at first, you know, and then suddenly, out of nowhere -
bam! Fifteen thousand. I mean, the bid jumped to a cool cowin' 15,000.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Yeah. Yeah. I remember us talking.
GWEN: I thought it was £15,005.50.
GARY: Yeah, it was, yeah. I mean, I wouldn't spend that kind of money unless it was
my own personal private body part or something. Would you?
GWEN: No. No.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): No way! I remember, yes. I waited a couple of days and then I
got an email telling me to come to, er ... come to a restaurant.
(Gwen opens Eugene’s phone and looks at the shoes again.)
GWEN: You saw Eugene the day he died, didn't you?
GARY: Yeah, I met up with him before he went to meet the alien. I had a cup of
coffee. He was scared.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Was I? Course I was.
GARY: So he went to make the exchange -
GWEN: £15,005.50 for the eye, right? And this was somewhere on the A48 perhaps?
GARY: Or not.
GWEN: Or not?
GARY: Eugene was very secretive. Could have been in Splott?
GWEN: Splott?
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): That doesn't sound right, mate.
(Gwen shows him the camera phone pictures of the other shoes.)
GWEN: Who are these people with you, Gary?
(Gary looks at the photos.)
GWEN: Why would Eugene take a photo of your shoes? And, whose are the other shoes?
GARY: They're just random shoes, I should think. I miss him.
(Gwen takes the phone from him.)
DISSOLVE TO:
CU: THE FULL MOON
FADE TO:
INT. MOTEL ROOM – NIGHT
(The view overlooks the boats in the quay. Gwen looks at the pictures in Eugene’s
phone. Aside from Gary’s shoes, there’s a pair of men’s shoes and
women’s shoes.)
(Eugene paces in the back.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Yes, yes, I can remember! I called a taxi, and then, then I
put the eye in a freezer bag. And then there was ...
(Gwen takes out a set of keys from the plastic bag and she looks at it. He’s got an
alien head keychain among his keys.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Yes, I was walking up this road going up towards ... um, a
shiny building with ... a great door which said something about ... something about ...
(Gwen finds a piece of crumpled paper caught in the keys.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Happiness. Happiness.
(Gwen opens the piece of paper and sees an orange pac man. Eugene looks at Gwen.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): I don't want you to find out what happened. I don't want this
to end. I love you. I love you.
(Gwen suddenly gets off the bed. She stops in front of Eugene as she looks out the window.
Eugene doesn’t move. Gwen continues to look out the window.)
(She pushes the curtain closed and walks away.)
CUT TO:
INT. MOTEL ROOM – NIGHT
(Gwen is sleeping in bed. Eugene sleeps on the pillow next to her. In her sleep,
Gwen’s hand moves and comes close to Eugene’s head. Eugene’s eyes open and
he smiles.)
INT. MOTEL ROOM – MORNING
(Gwen’s alarm. Eugene gets up quickly. Gwen is slower. She checks her PDA.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): I thought we were on holiday.
EXT. COUNTRYSIDE (STOCK) – DAY
(Gwen’s car crosses the screen.)
INT. GWEN’S CAR (MOVING) -- DAY
(Gwen is driving while Eugene looks around the area.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Yes. Yes ... this is it.
We came up the hill, and there it was! There it was, the ...
(Gwen sees the yellow sign with the pac man on it.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): The Happy Cook?
(It doesn’t sound familiar to Eugene.)
EXT. TURN OFF – DAY – CONTINUOUS
(Gwen takes the turn off the road into the parking lot. She parks and gets out of the
car.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Yeah, I walked towards the door, wondering who exactly I
would be meeting, excited, quite stressed, shitting myself frankly.
INT. HAPPY COOK – CONTINUOUS
(Gwen and Eugene walk in.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): I opened the door ... I walked in, and saw ...
(Eugene looks around while Gwen looks at people’s shoes.)
GWEN: I've been looking for a pair of shoes like that for ages.
(She notes the waitress’s black shoes are like the ones on Eugene’s camera
phone.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): And saw ... And saw ... my mates.
(Quick flashback to: [THE HAPPY COOK] )
(Gary and The Video Clerk are sitting in a booth.)
(The front door opens and Eugene walks in. Eugene sees them and walks over to them.)
EUGENE JONES: Hi, guys. Good to see you, but erm ... I've got the rendezvous.
JOSH: It's us.
EUGENE JONES: I know but ... he won't want a crowd. I'm meeting the buyer. I'm
meeting the alien.
JOSH: We ARE the alien, man. We bought it.
EUGENE JONES: What?
(The waitress arrives the their food.)
JEN (WAITRESS): Here. (to Eugene) What are you having?
EUGENE JONES: Erm ... I'll have a milkshake, thank you. Banana.
(The waitress leaves. Eugene sits down.)
JOSH: Yeah. So we are the official buyers. Can we see the merchandise?
(Eugene grabs a napkin and wipes his brow.)
EUGENE JONES: I don't quite know what you're trying to tell me here.
(Eugene takes out the eye. He doesn’t give it to them.)
GARY: See, we did it as a joke to cheer you up. We didn't think we'd be the actual
buyers.
JOSH: Then he said you said you thought it was the alien, and we thought ... well,
that's funny, innit? Come on, Eugene, get real. But then we thought, "Let him dream,
man. Life's short and really boring." So then we went on betting and then ...
EUGENE JONES: You bid 15,000 for the eye?
VIDEO CLEERK: Not us. No. No way. It turns out there was real interest.
GARY: Someone else bid the fifteen thou, but then HE got greedy.
JOSH: Ketchup, please. He just couldn't resist one more measly little bid.
GARY: £15,005.50. And then, well nothing. Nada. Endville.
JOSH: Okay, shut the fuck up, Gary. Point is, we bought it. We are the purchasers.
Ta-dah!
EUGENE JONES: So you've got £15,005.50 on you, have you?
JOSH: We've got £34.
GARY: £34, Eugene. That's not a poke in the eye, so to speak.
EUGENE JONES: I'm calling a cab.
(Eugene takes his phone out. Pete tries to stop him.)
JOSH: Hey slow down.
(The waitress arrives and Eugene gets his phone away from Pete. Eugene takes photos of
their shoes.)
JEN (WAITRESS): Banana milkshake?
(She puts the milkshake in front of Eugene.)
EUGENE JONES: Thank you.
(The waitress leaves.)
EUGENE JONES: If it's all such a sodding joke, why do you even want it?
JOSH: I got a friend with a visual impairment.
EUGENE JONES: You're going to re-sell it online, aren't you? You cheap little gits.
You know he's out there ...
JOSH: Who?
EUGENE JONES: The alien, and he'll pay anything.
JOSH: Eugene, man, I'm as partial as the next guy to a bit of sci-fi but ... a
green geezer with six eyes? Get real, guy. I checked the bid history. Mr. C. Blackstaff is
a collector of alien ephemera and Nazi memorabilia. Also beanie babies. Teeny bit cuckoo,
but endearingly rich. And if he's willing to pay 15,000 ...
(Pete knocks the eye out of Eugene’s grip. The two men dive for the eye on the
floor.)
JEN (WAITRESS): (shouts) Oi!
(End of flashback.)
(Gwen is talking with Jen, the waitress.)
JEN (WAITRESS): So now they're inconveniencing customers.
GWEN: You stepped in?
JEN (WAITRESS): Well, I tried.
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) I didn't really know what the eye was any more ... but I was
damned if I was going to let it go for £34 and a banana milkshake.
(As Gary watches, Eugene and Josh stand up. Eugene has the eye. He shoves it in his mouth
and swallows it. Everything shifts as though something’s happening.)
(Josh grabs Eugene from behind.)
JOSH: Heimlich! (shouts) Heimlich!
GARY: What are you doing?
JOSH: Getting the goods, idiot! Get the milkshake!
(Gary grabs the milkshake and tries to make Eugene drink it.)
(End of flashback.)
JEN (WAITRESS): Well, that's just not acceptable behavior. Not at a Happy Cook.
They were making a public spectacle of themselves.
(Quick flashback to: Eugene gets free. Josh punches him in the face. Eugene runs out the
door. End of flashback.)
JEN (WAITRESS): And that was it, he was out the door and gone.
(She looks up and sees Josh and Gary walk into the restaurant. Gary is wearing a hood over
his face.)
JEN (WAITRESS): Oh, my God! That is so weird!
(They head for the waitress. Eugene walks toward them and clear through them.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): You bastards! You are so dead! I mean, Josh, you're just a
dickhead, but Gary ... We were ... I mean, we were mates.
JOSH: (to Jen) Hi, doll.
JEN (WAITRESS): Are you talking to me?
JOSH: Yeah. Sorry. Look, I don't know whether you remember us from last week.
JEN (WAITRESS): Yes.
JOSH: Yeah, now the thing is, there may be people coming in to ask questions.
(Gwen is standing in the back. Gary sees her.)
JOSH: A woman specifically. And I think ...
GARY: (warns) Josh.
JOSH: ... it would be in your best interests if ...
GARY: Shut up, Josh.
JOSH: The woman is complying, man.
(Gary looks at Gwen. Josh turns and sees Gwen. She waves back to them.)
JOSH: Okay. Cool.
(Josh turns to run out the door. Gary trips him and he falls to the floor.)
JOSH: What did you do that for, twat?
(Gary takes his hood off.)
GARY: I miss him!
(Eugene watches as Gary sits in a booth chair.)
SHORT TIME CUT TO:
(Gwen talks with Josh and Gary. Eugene looks out the window.)
GWEN: So he ran out the door and you two ran after him?
GARY: Yeah. We chased him across the car park. But Eugene was quite fast. Josh had
new shoes, he was making a fuss ...
JOSH: Hey, hey ... You are overweight.
GARY: He hared across the road and we lost him. Honest to God.
(Gwen looks at them.)
GWEN: Okay.
GARY: That's it.
GWEN: Okay.
(Gwen stands up and goes to stand in front of the window next to Eugene. She takes her
phone out to make a call.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): All those cars. All those lives moving through space ...
GWEN: (to phone) Hello. Can you give me the number for Filey Garage, Filey Road,
Cardiff, please?
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): All that humanity whizzing by in a frenzy –
INSERT: EUGENE RUNS ACROSS THE FIELD
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): -- of burgers and chips, bank holiday fun, burst tires,
screaming kids and sudden heart-attacks.
GWEN: (to phone) Put me through, thanks.
INSERT: EUGENE RUNS ACROSS THE FIELD
GWEN: (to phone) Mr. Jones? You don't know me, but I'm a friend of your son Eugene.
I've got some bad news, I'm afraid.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) Now I remember.
INSERT: EUGENE RUNS ACROSS THE FIELD
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) Apart from a buzzing in my ear where Josh whacked me,
I felt good. I was running across a field on a Saturday morning. The smell of exhaust and
banana milkshake, a slight nausea, heart beating too fast cos I wasn't that fit –
(Eugene runs out through the trees and stops in the middle fo the road. A red car is
coming down the road straight toward him. Eugene doesn’t see it.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) -- all the stuff that tells you you're alive.
(Eugene turns and sees the car, license #P759 MFL. The car hits him. Eugene rolls off the
side of the road as the red car continues driving away.)
(Eugene’s body is on the ground.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) By rights, I should be well pissed off - my mates had
cheated on me and I didn't meet any aliens, --
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. FUNERAL PARLOR -- DAY
(Eugene is at his funeral service.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) -- but I realized that when I swallowed the eye at the
Happy Cook, I was given a chance to look back on my life and see it for what it really
was.
(Eugene stops up the aisle next to Gary who is singing.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) Gary, I'm going to miss you. Not the biggest turn-out
you could hope for, but still. I wish I could ...
(Eugene stands in the middle of the room looking at the people there at his funeral. He
looks at Gwen.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): God, Gwen, I wish I could say thank you.
(Eugene looks at his dad.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) And here he is ... my dad, only 14 years late.
(Everyone sits down. Bronwen goes up to the podium to say something, but ends up crying
instead. Shaun gets to his feet to help her down.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) So, now I know it wasn't my fault my dad left, and
that, of course, he wasn't Superman or an alien, he's just an ordinary bloke.
(Shaun stands in the front to say a few words.)
SHAUN JONES: Uh, Eugene ... he was a good boy, but somehow ... things went wrong. I
wasn't there. I wish I could have seen him ... before ...
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) An ordinary bloke who made a mess of things.
(He sings "Danny Boy".)
LYRICS: Oh, Danny Boy. The pipes, the pipes are calling. From glen to glen and
down the mountainside. The summer's gone and all the flowers dying. Tis you must go and I
must stay behind but come ye back when summer's in the meadow or when the valley's hushed
and white with snow. And I'll be there in sunshine and in shadow...
(Eugene is alarmed when he sees the coffin sinking down into the case. He runs up to the
front.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) No! Not yet. Dad made a mess of things and went away,
and that's a shame really, it's a terrible pity, because we missed each other. Completely.
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. CEMETERY -- DAY
(Gwen and Eugene are at the intersection where the roads go through the cemetery. Gwen
paces in front of the main building.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): You know, 28 is one of those perfect numbers. It's equal to
the sum of its divisors. I'm 28. I was 28. I think I'm going to have to go soon, Gwen.
GWEN: Oh, God.
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): Yeah. Also, 28 centimeters per second is the top speed of a
lone lobster.
(The door to the building opens and the mortician holds out a paper package for Gwen.)
GWEN: Oh, hi. Thank you. I'm sorry I had to ask you to do that.
(He gives her the bag.)
MORTICIAN: Yeah, no problem.
(Gwen opens the package and looks inside. Eugene looks in the bag and sees the eye.)
EXT. JONES’ RESIDENCE – FRONT – DAY
(Friends and family gather to hug and mourn Eugene.)
EUGENE JONES (GHOST): (v.o.) So, if it's the eye that's been keeping me here, now
it's no longer inside me, why the hell am I still hanging around?
(Gwen walks down the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street.)
GWEN: Eugene? The eye is in the bag now, rather than in you.
(The Torchwood SUV pulls up near Gwen.)
GWEN: Are you ... ?
(Jack and the others get out. Owen smiles at her.)
OWEN: Hello, stranger!
JACK: Did you get it?
GWEN: Yeah, I got it.
(She shows them the paper package. Jack takes the eye out of the bag.)
JACK: (whistles) Impressive.
OWEN: (shrugs) Well, we haven't done the tests yet, so ...
(Owen turns and heads back to the SUV.)
TOSHIKO: Come on. We've got to go.
(Toshiko turns and heads back to the SUV.)
(Jack puts the eye back in the package and heads for the SUV.)
GWEN: Jack, can you give me five?
JACK: (o.s.) Yeah.
(Gwen pauses as she watches a silver car, license #CP04LKV, pull up in front of the
Jones’ house. Terry sees the car and turns his back to it. Bronwen puts a hand on his
shoulder. The back door opens and Shawn gets out.)
(From across the street, Eugene watches.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) In an average lifetime, the human heart will beat two million
times.
(As Eugene watches, Shaun walks up to his son and holds his hand out. Bronwen nods to
Terry, encouraging him. Terry turns around and shakes his dad’s hand.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) You'll produce over eight thousand gallons of saliva and grow
350 miles of hair.
(A blue car comes around the street corner, tires screeching.)
(Gwen watches the scene in front of her with a smiles on her face and steps onto the
street.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) You'll eat the equivalent in weight of six elephants.
(The blue car passes Jack who turns absently to watch it. He turns back to the others.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) Oh, isn't life amazing!
(Eugene glances at the car and sees Gwen on the road.)
EUGENE JONES: Gwen!
(He runs to her.)
EUGENE JONES: (shouts) GWEN!
(Eugene knocks Gwen off her feet and out of the oncoming car’s path.)
(The eye is knocked out of the package and falls onto the storm drain where it stops.)
(Bronwen and the others watch. Jack and the team head over to Gwen. They see Eugene.)
(Gwen turns and sees Eugene as well.)
GWEN: Hi. Oh, my God. Eugene!
EUGENE JONES: Are you okay?
GWEN: It is so good to see you! (She touches his arms.) Eugene, you're on my leg.
EUGENE JONES: Sorry!
GWEN: No, no, it's fine.
(Eugene gets up and helps Gwen up.)
EUGENE JONES: Sorry.
GWEN: It's fine. It's fine. It's fine.
(Eugene looks at his family in front of the house and stops.)
EUGENE JONES: (whispers) Can he see me?
SHAWN JONES: (softly) Eugene ...
EUGENE JONES: (smiles) He can see me!
(Gwen giggles. Bronwen is stunned. Eugene continues to hold Gwen’s hands.)
EUGENE JONES: Thanks.
GWEN: No, thank you. Thank you. You just saved my life.
EUGENE JONES: That's okay.
(Gwen kisses Eugene.)
EUGENE JONES: That's unbelievable. That's un-bloody-believable. Oh, God ... I think
that's it.
(Eugene picks up the eye off the storm drain and puts it in Gwen’s hand.)
EUGENE JONES: Goodbye, Gwen.
(A bright light surrounds Eugene completely engulfing him. Jack watches Eugene and the
light with a smile on his face. He steps closer to Gwen. Gwen looks up.)
GWEN: Don't go now, Eugene.
(OFF GWEN: The light fades.)
GWEN: Eugene, please don't go now.
(Camera pulls back from Gwen.)
GWEN: Eugene, please ... Please!
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) The average life is full of near misses and absolute hits, of
great love and small disasters.
(Jack holds Gwen’s hand as they all look up at the sky. We continue to pull up into
the sky.)
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) It's made up of banana milkshakes, loft insulation and random
shoes.
(We suddenly ZOOM completely out of the city – ZOOM back out of the country --
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) It's dead ordinary, and truly, truly amazing.
-- ZOOM back out on the planet – back out into space --
EUGENE JONES: (v.o.) What you've got to realize is, it's all here, now. So breathe
deep and swallow it whole. Because take it from me, life just whizzes by, and then, all of
a sudden, it's ...
-- ZOOM back from the planet EARTH as it disappears into nothing --
FADE OUT TO WHITE –
INSERT: PREVIEW FOR NEXT EPISODE
ROLL END CREDITS
==========================
END OF EPISODE
==========================
Transcript by intrepid
Contact the Transcriptionist at intrepidly002@yahoo.com
As a courtesy, do not archive this transcript without written permission from the Transcriptionist.
==========================
TITLE/OPENING CREDITS
==========================
TORCHWOOD
1X09: RANDOM SHOES
ORIGINAL AIR DATE IN UK: 12/10/2006
TRANSCRIBED FROM DL
Starring:
JOHN BARROWMAN as Captain Jack Harkness
EVE MYLES as Gwen Cooper
BURN GORMAN as Owen Harper
NAOKO MORI as Toshiko Sato
GARETH DAVID LLOYD as Ianto Jones
Created by: RUSSELL T DAVIES
Producer: RICHARD STOKES
Producer: SOPHIE FANTE
Written by: JACQUETTA MAY
Directed by: JAMES ERSKINE
==========================
END CREDITS
==========================
CAST & CREW
JOHN BARROWMAN as Captain Jack Harkness
EVE MYLES as Gwen Cooper
BURN GORMAN as Owen Harper
NAOKO MORI as Toshiko Sato
GARETH DAVID-LLOYD as Ianto Jones
PAUL CHEQUER as Eugene (Jones)
LUKE BROMLEY as Young Eugene (Jones)
NICOLA DUFFETT as Bronwen Jones
ROGER ASHTON-GRIFFITHS as Mr. Garrett
STEVEN MEO as Josh
CELYN JONES as Gary
ROBYN ISAAC as Linda
GARETH PORTER as Shaun Jones
JOSHUA HUGHES as Terry Jones
AMY STARLING as Waitress
LEROY LIBURD as Café Owner
RYAN CHAPPELL as Pete
N. WALES ASTRONOMY SOCIETY CONVENTION
ABERYSTWYTH UNIVERSITY
SCIENCE AND NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM )
Co-Producer: CHRIS CHIBNALL
1st Assistant Directors: NAEL ABBAS / DAF ARWYN JONES
2nd Assistant Director: DANIELLA BOWEN
3rd Assistant Directors: RHIAN SALISBURY / NICK BRITZ
Location Manager: PAUL DAVIES
Unit Manager: GERAINT HAVARD JONES
Location Scout: IWAN ROBERTS
Runners: JONEY LYONS / MICHAEL GREEN
Production Co-Ordinator: CARMELINA PALUMBO
Production Secretary: MARGARITA FELICES
Script Secretaries: HELEN PUGSLEY / CLAIRE THOMAS
Accounts Assistants: DEBI GRIFFITHS / KATH BLACKMAN
Continuity: SALLY HOPE
Script Editor: BRIAN MINCHIN
Camera Operator: JAMES MOSS
Focus Puller: CHRIS REYNOLDS
Camera Assistants: GARETH COOP
Grip: DAVE LOGAN
Boom Operator: JAMES DRUMMOND
Gaffer: GEORGE VINCE
Best Boy: SUZANNE SANDERS
Stunt Co-ordinator: RODERICK P WOODRUFF
Chief Super Art Director: STEPHEN NICHOLAS
Supervising Art Director: KEITH DUNNE
Art Dept. Prod. Manager: JONATHAN ALLISON
Art Dept of Manager: ADRIAN ANSCOMBE
Art Dept Co-ordinator: MATTHEW NORTH
Standby Art Director: CATHY FEATHERSTONE
Standby Props: MATT BACON / KEITH PITT
Standby Carpenter: GARETH THOMAS
Standby Rigger: NEIL RUCK
Standby Painter: CLIVE CLARKE
Designer: PENNY HARVEY
Property Master: STUART WOODISSE
Props Buyer: CATHERINE SAMUEL
Props Chargehand: DEWI THOMAS
Props Fab Manager: BARRY JONES
Construction Manager: MATTHEW HYWEL-DAVIES
Construction Chargehand: SCOTT FISHER
Graphics: BBC WALES GRAPHICS DESIGN
Costume Supervisor: CHARLOTTE MITCHELL
Costume Assistants: DAN SUMMERVILLE / MAXINE BROWN
Make-up Supervisor: CLAIRE PRITCHARD / SARAH ASTLEY-HUGHES
Make-up Assistants: HAYLEY WATKINS / ELLEN RHIAN / ANWEN HUGHES / VICKY OWEN
Casting Associate: ANDY BRIERLEY
Assistant Editor: MATT MULLINS
Post Prod Supervisors: HELEN VALLIS / CHRIS BLATCHFORD
Post Prod Co-ordinator: MARIE BROWN
On-line Editors: JON EVERETT / MATTHEW CLARKE
Colourist: MICK VINCENT
Dubbing Mixer: TIM RICKETTS
Sound Editor: PAUL McFADDEN
Super Sound Editor: DOUG SINCLAIR
Sound FX Editor: HOWARD EAVES
Casting Director: ANDY PRYOR CDG
Production Accountant: CERI TOTHILL
Sound Recordist: JEFF MATTHEWS
Costume Designer: RAY HOLMAN
Make-up Designer: MARIE DORIS
Music: MURRAY GOLD / BEN FOSTER
Visual Effects: THE MILL
Vis Effects Producers: WILL COHEN / MARIE JONES
Vis Effects Supervisor: DAVE HOUGHTON
On Set Vis FX Super: BARNEY CURNOW
Special Effects: ANY EFFECTS
Editor: PHIL HOOKWAY
Production Designer: EDWARD THOMAS
Director of Photography: SIMON BUTCHER
Associate Producer: TERRY REEVE
Production Executive: JULIE SCOTT
Executive Producer: RUSSELL T DAVIS
Executive Producer: JULIE GARDNER
A BBC Wales Production in association with the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation
bbc.co.uk/torchwood
(c) BBC MMVI
Dated:04/16/2007~lky
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