I was still actively binging and purging (by throwing up, exercise or laxatives) when I got pregnant. I also was only eating one meal a day. I had just lost some weight in the last 2 months, and my hair had started to fall out. My body went crazy at first and I gained back all of the weight I had just lost (12 pounds) all in the first trimester. To make matters worse, my doctor has no understanding or sympathy for my eating disorder problems. By week 21, he sent me to a nutritionist because he thought I was gaining too much weight (I had gained 40 pounds already). I was freaking out because most of the weight came from eating more than 1,000 calories a day and not purging. I also quite smoking by 7 weeks, which made me gain a little weight. i KNOW deep in my heart that my bulimia is the reason that i am not concieving. I am trying to control my weight by practicing my eating disorder. I am scared because i have a long way to go and am going to gain more weight. I feel like a failure because I am not one of those women who don't even show til their 5th month. I am taking every day one day at a time, going to OA meetings, writing, and seeing my therapist. I have not told my husband yet. I am scared. I am 13 weeks pregnant with our first - very planned and wanted - child. I have never been fully recovered. I still have increasing periods where I limit my intake severely for months, and I struggle DAILY with food - even during "good" times .... I was VERY sick these first 3 months and lost 12 pounds. I am beginning to feel better now and that scares me because my body is not throwing up the food anymore on its own. I am an intelligent woman of faith. I want this baby and want to do everything I can to have a healthy baby. And I am so ashamed at the fact that my dumb eating disorder is marring one of the most amazing events in life. I fear that this pregnancy will make me fat and that my body will be out of my control. I secretly want to lose 25 pounds so that when I put on the average 25 pounds in the later months of pregnancy, I will come out even. It is ridiculous and I am so ashamed. But I won't eat - my body isn't even huungry anymore - it's as if the hunger sensors have shut down. I am committed to taking my prenatal vitamin, drinking 8 ounces of water a day, and eating a PowerBar. Anything else I eat after that is just extra. [advising a woman who worried that she wouldn't be able to get pregnant because she had amenorrhea] When you don't have enough body fat, you stop menstruating, but once you gain some weight and periods return, there's usually no damage done in terms of being able to conceive. So don't worry too much about it, and best of luck to you!!
From a message board devoted to romantic and sexual relationships between cousins (we haven't found the online forum for those in brother/sister romances yet):
I am 21 and I have been having sex with my 14 year-old cousin; she loves it but I want to spend my life with her but kids I don't know My wife and her married first cousin are having an affair. My wife and I have four wonderful children, and I don't want to loose that. I just don't think it is right for my children to see her cousin spending the night in the same bed with their mother. Once we are divorced, I really don't care who she dates, or gets married to. All that I care about are those four great kids. Am I being unreasonable when I ask my soon to be ex-wife not to date her cousin when the kids are around? Based on this sight, I would think that you would be for the relationship, but most of society would not agree. I hope I am wrong about your answer. I'm a 14 year old female and I have a problem. Well, I told my 2nd cousin how I feel about him and he has the same feelings for me too but, the only thing is I thought we were going to be more closer but it seems like we're more apart. I want us to be like,well... boyfriend and girlfriend like but,he hasn't even kissed me yet. Even though he had many chances to. Can you please tell me whats up with him and please give me advice on how I could tell him I want more of our relationship? [Maybe he has heard that cousin-cousin relationships are frowned on in your locale. Just maybe.] Well my story goes like this...a long time ago my first cousin took advantage of me, that is she told me to play this game and well you can guess what it was. Now this left a sexual desire in me which I fulfilled with her younger brother. Having now grown out of this and returned to a heterosexual lifestyle my past actions still haunt me Hello, I am a 16 year old male teenager and I have a 12 year old cousin. And I need some really good advice. I am and had been sexually attracted to my cousin. I have urges to do things with her. I really want to touch her in ways but I am afraid that I'll get in trouble because she might tell her mom. What should I do? Should I tell her? How? And How do I get her interested in me?
And then there are people who try so hard to be worthy of the "fucked relationship" crown that they may only ever be runners up. Yes, there is a little message board devoted to the Iowa Septuplets.
i want to be on the springer show as I work in a strip club and am having a affair with three girls from the same club they dont know about each other and my boyfriend does'nt know either.
Yes, there is a little message board devoted to the Iowa Septuplets.
It's a little early, but I just want to say happy Birthday to 7 cool gals: Megan Melissa Mary Michelle Monica Molly Meredith Happy Birthday Again! I hope you enjoy adulthood!
Someone needn't be pregnant to have a relationship fucked by an eating disorder (see above). Imagine trying to help someone like this:
I am very small to start and love being VERY thin. i am very lucky that my kinky hubby loves me VERY skinny to. He only likes slinny girls they excite him greatly. It is super he helps me in my obsession for being skinny. I pity you who have no support dears. we are also different in that my diet is part of our sex life. when I get serious hunger pains or weak in my diet we have sex. the more I need help the more kinky he makes me. I started at about 88 pounds when I graduated from high school. I could not get too skinny or the school would have caused trouble. Now I am in collage there are no limits. I am now aout 70 pounds and the goal is under 50 if I do not get to weak to be a good lover. My diet is kinky to but I will not get into that now. are there any others here that use sex as a help in dieting??
On the other side of this issue there are people like this. Perhaps this man is the husband of the woman mentioned just above:
I don't know how to help my wife. She will not tell me her weight, but she is 6 feet tall and looks to be around 100 - 110 pounds. She has a serious heart problem that could kill her. She has a lot of weird food rituals that are getting worse. Like, she will only eat with a certain plate at a certain time. I do not think she ever throws up or does any of that stuff. She will not go to counseling. I do not know what to do for her. Please help.
And here we have a message board for natural weaning.
I am still nursing my dd, who is just about 5 1/2 y.o. She now only nurses very, very briefly and usually only once per day or per every couple days (she nurses a few seconds or less per side just before bedtime). I am glad that I nursed dd past 3 y.o....For us weaning has been a very looooong, gradual process, which is still happening. She has been so healthy - rarely gets sick and when she does get sick it is very mild...I was so glad she was still nursing when she started preschool and was coming into a strange situation and coming into contact with so many new people. I have no regrets about the night-weaning b/c I truly believe that my dd was ready (and so was I) and that overall it was the right thing to do for our family. And I am enjoying these last few precious months (years?) of nursing, even though my milk is almost gone now. I am through the rough spots, of hearing others criticize me for nursing too long, mostly b/c our nursing is now so brief and so private, and b/c few of those who criticized us a couple years ago even realize that we are still nursing. I haven't been active at all in this board, but I just weaned my 3 year old (my baby of four kids) and I'm feeling down. I know she is fine - but for me it is the end of this wonderful period in my life and it makes me sad. For the past 13 years I've either been pregnant, or nursing, or both and I just can't believe that this part of me, which was always such a primary part of my identity, is now over. I feel I can't even talk about it with anyone. Most people don't even know that I was still breast feeding, and those that knew thought it was about time I stopped. Even my usually very patient and supportive husband can't understand why I am feeling so down now. I WANT MY BABIES BACK!! Any of you who are still nursing and feeling pressured to stop - DON't! Stop when you and your little one really feel ready.
This comes from a message board for parents who have lots of children.
[in response to 'want to have more kids but how get that many carseats to fit'] We solved that by buying a 12 passenger Chevy Express van....LOL Only problem is we only have 3 spaces left... two would fit an extra car seat since they are 4 person seats. We amy have to upgrade to Greyhound by the time we get 12 kids.
A paraphrase of a Dr. Laura segment in which an "attachment parent" confides her problems:
Man: I want to know if it is morally correct for me to insist that my 5-year old sleep in her own bed. Dr. Laura: Has she been sleeping with you her whole life? Man: Yes, my wife is big on the family bed. Dr. Laura: Have you and your wife had an intimate relationship since your daughter was born? Man: Yes, but it doesn't happen often as it's very difficult with her in the bed with us.
Now if your marriage seems in trouble, there could be lots of contributing factors. This is from a newsgroup for trans-sexuals. Note especially the 'boobs' comment.
My wife and I have been essentially separated for a bit; we have decided on trying to work things out. My Lesbian friend remains close and helpful; she supports me trying to work out some accomadation with my wife(born again Christian) and we remain the closest of friends. My wife and I begin counseling together Saturday, there are multiple issues on the table, but I am sure that the TS issue will be a biggie. We had problems before that came into the open that never seemed to resolve(she has some anger issues, I responded by not being open and honest with her.) I am afraid though that the counselor will lock into the TS issue and the whole thing will be a collosal waste of time(I susoect that the reason that CJ(my Lesbian friend) has no problem with this is cause she already figures my wife will focus on TS to avoid the pre-existing issues). Anyhow, wish me luck and I will keep everyone posted on how it goes. On an up note, my epileptic activity has gone to zero since Hormone therapy---a colleague figures that the brain is more qquiet since some of the conflict, mentally and biochemically, has decreased. Ought to be interesting on another note since only 2 colleagues know that I am TS, though my ability to pass as male is going to be non-existent soon(boobs----who'd have thought.....). I know that in my field, when it concerns colleagues, confidentially sometimes is a myth, and I am rather high profile in my field. If colleagues start opening the door for me, I'll know I am "outed"(wry smile) [name]
And here we have the message board for parents who want their children to be starlets.
I am a new mother with an 8 month son who loves the camera. (I know, every mother says that!) I was wondering if this was too young of an age to try to get into anything? Also I'm from the grand state of Kentucky, land of little opportunity in the way of modeling, etc. (Don't get me wrong, it's a great state!) What do I do, and furthermore, how do I go about doing it? Thanks from a confused mom! [name]
This situation is one of several stories found on a message board for parents of teenaged mothers.
We recently found letters from the sperm donor in dd's room talking about "our baby" and how he can't wait to get out of prison so he can "hold the both of you" GAG. I called the police department and they told me there's nothing in the order of protection about letters! It says in writing "no contact, direct or indirect" sure seems like contact to me!!! After I cooled off, though, I started thinking. Even though she's only 15, if she chooses to allow him access to the baby there's nothing I can do about it. I can enforce no contact with HER until she's 18 but not Destiny. Unless dd chooses to fight it, the scum is her father.
And of course mothers aren't the only ones in prison. This quote was passed on to me as coming from a female inmate.
I don't think it's fair they put me in here again just cause I late for my appointment. I got 9 babies at home who need me.
These quotes are from the online message board for an Oprah Winfrey Show about couples where one partner wanted children and the other didn't. The programme itself contained some interesting specimens, such as the woman who said 'I have a year and a half left of school, then I want to focus on my career. I don't want to be pregnant then.', seeming unaware that rearing continues after pregnancy ends.
I THINK HAVING A CHILD IS A TIME OF JOY AND HAPPINESS. AS WELL AS A BLESSING FROM GOD,JUST BECAUSE THE FIRST PREGNANCY WASN'T SO GREAT, DOESN'T NECCESSARILY MEAN YOU WILL RELAPSE. I HONESTLY THINK A CHILD IS WORTH ANY ULTIMATE SACRIFICE.. My dad didn't want children, but my mother knew what she wanted and insisted. No, the narriage didn't work out. Big deal. I'm here! And I'm so glad I'm alive!!! My dad was never a part of my life, but that was his choice. My mother created a beautiful life for me. She had her child and now we run a business together. This isn't the dark ages, women. The world is full of men who want to have a baby with you. Trust me, there are some 5 billion men on this planet, there's one out there who wants what you want, or at least won't stand in your way. Yes, it may be true that children of divorced parents have more insecurities and blah, blah, blah...but at least I'm alive to feel insecure! My message is: You decide what you want in life. If someone doesn't want the same thing, pay attention to that! This is your only life and by the way, Statistics show that it becomes very difficult for many women to concieve even in their early thirties. So, don't waste time with someone else's opinion where your destiny is concerned. This is your only life. My boyfriend and I having been dating for 5+ years. We are talking seriously and happily about getting married. We have a great relationship and are really starting to grow together spiritually. (Thanks Dr. Phil.) He has a significant blood disorder. He wasn't supposed to live this long and may die younger than most. (I happen to think that God makes that decision so I don't worry about it too much. We've been talking about kids. I love kids and would love to have at least 1 (2?) although the responsiblity of it scares me silly. He, because of his medical issues and the responsibility, is terrified. This is one of the hardest situations I ever had to deal with. My husband always promised me children, but when the time came to have them, he changed his mind. We love each other very much---how does one choose? I know I'll regret not having children the rest of my life. I feel stuck and very disappointed and betrayed. But what can I do, leave? Even if I did, there is no guarantee I'll meet someone else that wants children in time, I'm 39 already! i'm interested in what you finally decide. i, too, have a spouse who does not seem to want children. it's agonizing to me, because this is my second marriage (i'm almost 30; we've been married for 6 1/2 years), and i really want it to work out. i LOVE my husband, but i know that i'll regret not having children as well. i'm wondering if i should wait, and if so for how long? it all seems SO unfair, and this is by far the most painful situation i've ever had to deal with in my entire life. I wanted a child, but didn't find a man who I thought would be a good father and partner. I didn't want to have my first child in my 30's. So, at 25 I got pregnant and had a beautiful son. I finished college and have completely focused my life on my parenting. I BELIEVE IN A RELATIONSHIP BOTH PARTIES MUST SACRIFICE TO SURVIVE, THINGS COME WHEN SOME AREN'T READY BUT WE MUST EMBRASS EACH OTHER AND SUPPPORT EACH OTHER IN THE SITUATION. I MYSELF HAVE SACRIFICED FOR MY SPOUSE IT WAS SOMETHING THAT I DID AND DIDN'T WANT TO DO AT THE TIME, BUT AS I GO THROUGH THE MOTIONS WITH MY THEN 5 MTH OLD AND MY NOW 14MTH OLD SON, I KNOW I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION BY SUPPORTING MY SPOUSES DECISION, WE AGREED THAT IN THE FUTURE IF I AM BLESSED WITH ANOTHER PREGNANCY THAT MY SPOUSE WILL SUPPORT THE DECISION THAT I MAKE.................... What if after [a couple on the programme] have saved the money, she still feels the same about wanting a baby, and he still doesn't want one? The man will have what he wanted all along, a new car, the woman on the other hand will probably feel an incredible void in her life, because her needs[cough] will not have been met. Where is the fairness in that, Dr. Phil I am 30 yrs old and my husband is 39. I have no children of my own, he has one who spends summers with us. My dilema is my husband has recently said he DOES NOT want anymore children. I, not hearing my biological clock yet, am not sure if I do or don't. My husband is great with kids, he is always the one playing with my nieces and nephews at family gatherings. My family and friends are laying on the "When are you going to have kids?" pretty heavy. I am worried that I will regret not having children later in life, but at the same time I can not see myself having a child with my husband. Someone asked me the other day that if I was married to someone else would I have children and after I thought about it my answer was yes. My husband has said that having a child would probably result in a divorce. I am not sure what to do. I love my family! During this season I can't imagine what it would be like not to be surrounded by my family. There are so many wonderful memories I think you're giving up. There was a couple at the end of the show today that decided to travel w/ their time instead of trying to have children. They mentioned being happier than some married couples with children. My question to you is how do they know that? They have nothing to compare with. If you don't mind I'd like paraphrase my mother; their's no bouqet better than yellow danylions. And as my mother hints now; no joy like seeing your first grandchild. There is nothing harder to live with than regret. Two-thumbs up to "HAVE" from me. My husband and I were told that we were having a girl (several ultrasounds). We were both excited then we found out we were having a boy. We were still excited. Two years later, my husband wanted to have another child. I told him that I didn't want to because I didn't think I could handle two boys. I have two sisters and I felt that I had no idea how to raise one boy nevermind two. Anyway he really wanted another child and convinced me that if we used a method to have a girl I would be happy. Well we used a method and we ended up having a boy. It was very hard for me. I felt that we had made a big mistake and that the child was going to suffer. I really struggled for about a year. I still get misty eyed when a friend has a girl and I think of all of the things she will get to do with her daughter that I never will. I feel like I've been cheated even though I know I am blessed to have the little boy that I now love. We talked about children before marriage and both wanted to have a child, but we never really discussed how many. We have one daughter who has been the greatest joy. But the responsibility of everything in raising a child really freaked my husband, and he made it clear he did not want any more so he could do his best by this one beautiful person; and he has. However, I wanted to have another child. I wanted my daughter to have a brother or sister. I had friends tell me to just have an "accident", but I couldn't do that.
From a message board discussion on 'spirited' (unruly) adoptive children:
[describing adopted child] Our eight year old son has been small since he came home 2 years ago. He was 6 years old and 32 pounds. His birth parents fed him only bread and water and a thin soup sometimes and he was left alone for days at a time with no food until he was taken by police at the age of 4 to the orphanage. He had intestinal parasites that we got rid of with medication a few months after he came home. ... It was no surprise when the doctor discussed with me his early nutrition that this is a big factor. Plus the internal parasites could hamper him for years. He probably ate rotton food in Russia when his parents would disappear for weeks at a time. I know this is why he has a hard time learning at school (fetal alcohol symptoms). The point of his childhood was brought home when the Dr. asked me how [child] got about a 2 inch curved scar that goes up from the edge of his mouth. I said a dog bit him and his mom sewed him up with a needle and thread, the needle punctures are very apparent. She just stopped and it seemed to dawn on her just how bad my beloved son had it at the hands of his birth parents. Olya was treated so much worse and yet fared better. She had sugar water for weeks on end.
Here are a couple of messages from a board dealing with unplanned pregnancies.
Pregnant with baby number 7 and hubby is FURIOUS!!!! Hi there!! I'n new to this, but looking for a bit of advice concerning a furious hubby. This pregnancy was DEFINETLY NOT planned, but then all of my pregnancy have been a bit of a surprise. You name the protection, and I've used it!! Hubby is extremely upset that this happened as he did not want anymore,(I did however----in 3 years!!) I have 5 boys and one girl, work second shift as a nurse and am very busy! A lot of people may wonder why we aren't fixed, but I do not believe in that---but hubby does! This will be our third together as I have 4 from my first marriage. My first appt with the doc is today, and am nervous about how the doc will react when I tell him that hubby is mad, giving me the cold shoulder, blaming me for the whole mess, and is hoping that it is something other than a baby! And as for a sex life now, FORGET IT!! We are pregnant with number 7 which was not planned at all!! WEll the latest report from the upset dh is that he is not going to have sex with me anymore once the baby is born!!! TElls me that he will not have sex again unless I allow him to go and get fixed!!! Even if I beg for it real hard, he says he wants no more accidents!!! I tell him about several babies that have been conceived after a vasectomy and the sperm count was clear, but he still will not believe that one either!! So if you gals have any input on this latest development let me know-----kinda funny, but also is quite sad as well!!! My doc tells me that men just sometimes never get it!!!
From a message board for people with small penises (including micropenis, an often-ego-devastating condition):
... I have been living with my girl friend for about four months and we get along famously. Recently, while rummaging through our dresser drawers for some briefs and socks I came across a vibrator, a rather large one at that. I asked her what this was doing here and she admitted she was using it. She said she had been using it almost from the day I moved in despite the fact that we have sex often. When I asked her why she was using it she said that she had to because I wasn't able to satisfy her with my small cock. She said that because I'm so small my dick is no turn on for her and that she can't feel it while we're having sex. She also admitted that she was still seeing a friend of mine whom I know to be very well endowed. She told me that she was having sex with him because he could satisfy her with his large dick whereas I couldn't. She also admitted there was no affection involved with him and that she fully intended to stay with me. My reactions to this shocker were twofold: First, the humiliation that my cock was too small to satisfy her was a turn-on for me. Secondly, I was not angry that she was having sex with my friend since I couldn't satisfy her and I now knew it. [...] I have seen his cock and he is very well built, I'd say probably 7-8 inches long and about 5.5 inches around. My reaction to seeing it was one of excitement and, yes, I wanted to touch it---and more.
If you want, you can go back to our home.